I was once told that you don’t have to believe in evil for it to affect you anyway. It was also mentioned to me that the only reason I would say evil exists is because I believe in a God. Belief in God automatically places me in the religious category. If I believe in God, it is often assumed that I must also believe in the devil. “No God, no devil.” This is not true at all, because I believed in God but I didn’t believe in evil. I couldn’t conceive in my mind that God would ever let anything evil happen to people. It was never God’s fault; from the beginning of time, it was all about obedience. If Adam and Eve had listened to God, we wouldn’t be in the kind of world we live in today. So if you’re obedient to God and try to live like Jesus, by following his examples and teachings, nothing bad would or could ever happen to you. Jesus died for us and resurrected, so he protects us at all times and he promised never to leave us comfortless[John14:18]

My dad would always say, “in this world there is negative and positive, that is what brings balance, neither can exist without the other.” He would always try to educate me about the paranormal. Especially when we’d watch a horror movie, he’d always say things like, “this sort of thing does happen for real.” The worst for me, was the movie the exorcist with Linda Blair in the seventies. The visual effects and dramatics was so vivid it strongly affected my imagination to the point that I went to bed for a while after seeing the movie terrified that demons can come after me and possess me too. I believe that my faith in God grew stronger than any other child in the world I would say, because I learnt every prayer of protection in the Bible and read the Bible every day faithfully. My dad was so superstitious, he would say things like,” walk in backward when you come home after midnight, because evil spirits will follow you in your house, don’t let a black cat cross your path at a certain time of the night, keep a metal horse shoe over your door for protection and luck of the home” to me as a child and all kinds of other crazy stuff. The worst is that witchcraft and things like voodoo do exist. People can take your picture, clothing and hair and put a spell on you. I did not believe and refused to believe him, that these kind of things can happen. I thought it was impossible.

It wasn’t until I was a grown woman living on my own, that I’ve experienced the paranormal and believed. All of the time when bad things happened to me in my life, I never saw it as being evil, I always thought it was my lack of obedience to God’s will for me. Truly in my heart I believed this, because nothing ever happened to me that God didn’t fix in my life especially when I’d pray. Evil was revealed to me for the first time when I met this woman who for some reason singled me out of every body else just to hate me and find faults in me that I didn’t know even see or know I had. I has been following a friend’s lead for the first time in my life to go and get what they call a reading by a physic. Again, I could say this happened to me because I was disobedient as I had a vision as a child at the age of twelve an angle came and said to me, “never have your future be told to you by anyone, if there is anything you need to know pray and God will reveal it to you, in dreams and visions.”

It was at a vulnerable time in my life where everything was going wrong and I’ve been praying and I just didn’t wait on the lord for answers this time, I was a little impatient for it, and boy was I ever sorry I didn’t wait on the Lord. I had thought that I was going through problems, well it only begun when I went to that woman. Because I was very naïve I always trusted my friend and people who where older than I. My friend was older than me and I always went to her for advice and she’d never guided me wrong. But for the first time it was like her advice took me to hell and back. This woman was as evil as the witches you see on television. I would see her in my dreams coming to hurt me and then one of my friends who knew her said, ” I don’t know this woman too well, but you do, and for so long, she says things about you with a hate that if I didn’t know you, I’d believe her, stay away from her please. Her intentions towards you is really bad, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”  Anyone who really knew how fragile, God fearing,humble, loving and compassionate person I am would know how much hearing someone hating on me would destroy my spirit. I am not saying that all physic readers are evil and people should not go to see them, but for me it is forbidden and I was told. I had no excuse, that I couldn’t even find myself blaming the woman personally, I was putting the blame to myself first. Apparently she wanted me to join her in what she was doing, I went there for a reading of my future not to join at the time what was considered a cult of some sort. She was good at what she did, certain things she told me about what was going on in my life had convinced me, she was truthful in her knowledge and I was ever so afraid of her because of it. One day she called me up and said, ” I know what you’re doing and thinking” she’d threaten me that she could hurt me in a way that no one would be able to help me. Ironic enough the same older woman who got me in this situation brought a Man of God, really that was his name in the church and he came to help me get away from this woman and that day she knew he was there. She’d called me cursing at me, using all kind of profanities. This brought back to my mind the things that my father always tried to warn me about that is possible like that people can take your picture, clothing even to where you are living and put spells on you, to control, hurt you and cause evil in your life. Like in the exorcist demon can come after to you. I was so terrified, as I was after seeing the movie the exorcist. I’d trusted this woman about every personal and important things about my life. I was accused by her of being a spy coming to learn her ways to destroy her, “what,” I thought to my self, is this woman crazy, a spy for whom?” My spiritual mother woke up to find blood all over her door and a dead animal with all kind of smelly oils on it. How did she knew who and where my spiritual mother lived to this day is a mystery. This woman was to me some sort of a demon, I would hear things moving around in my apartment at night when it was just me. This apartment complex was one of the most cleanest, well maintained place you’d ever seen, all of a sudden after living there for years we got infestation of bugs. My life was being played out like what’s in a horror movies, and I lived it, “it was real!” When I saw all the things that she was capable of doing I was ever so afraid for my life and my family’s, that once again I dove deeper into my faith in God. Not only did I read the Bible, I fasted, prayed and went to church. All of this is one of the reasons I became a prayer warrior. The first time I’d met her, she had warned me that I would be talking about her for the rest of my life. She’d took one look at me and said, “you can’t survive in this world like this you are going to die, it will eat you up, you’ve got to be strong.” I could have never seen it coming, because when she had said that to me, it was with such compassion, I cried, cause I knew exactly what she was speaking about, I was a push over and can easily be broken and it was the thing that had me so down. It was like she saw how naïve and fragile I am. I always thought to myself, was she part of God’s plan for me, she came across as some who really had meant well for me.

The man of God[Jesus I believe him to be] came once again as a deliver for me out of my troubles. He said, “Whom, do you fear, God or man?” and my reply was, ” man, because their fist I can see God’s I can’t.” He even started to scare me, when he began telling me all that God had design for my life and the reason I was going through what I was is because I have a calling on my life that I have to fulfill to find true peace and happiness. They are after you for what you possess, “who are they, and what in Jesus name do I possess?” I was so angry and fed up about all this hocus-pocus foolishness, I didn’t want to hear another word. He then looked at me and said, ” go outside and pick me up some flowers and then come back.” I told him ” this is a apartment complex there is no garden here.” I lived in the place for so long and never realized that there was flower garden in front of every one of the apartment building complexes. Was God showing me in some ways that I do not pay attention to  things, the little that can be very significant to my life or my well being. Like the flowers, they must of just planted them there recently I thought, cause I never saw them before ever and if I didn’t need or wasn’t sent to get them I would not have realized it was there. So then how much more things in my life unless I am in need, just happened to encounter or is right before me but I can’t see or even realize it exist.

When I arrived back home from getting the flowers, my attitude was change, I felt at peace and not angry any more. The man of God was sitting in the living room speaking to my friend. He look at me and said, “put the flowers in a vase and bring it to me with a light candle. I always kept candles in case of blackout or storm. So I got him the candle placed it on the coffee table with the flowers and he said a prayer and told me, ” take in the light.” I thought he meant physically to take the light I had lit in the candle holder on the table, but he said, “no don’t touch it”. He wanted me to take the light within my spirit, close my eyes and visualize myself drawing light into my spirit like I would inhaling my breath,” and I did. I saw the light like tiny bits of dust coming into my body and then surrounding me he said another prayer. That was it he said to me,” the next time I see you, I am going to bring you a Bible.” I never saw him again and didn’t even get the Bible. But there was something about his presence that stuck with me always in every aspect of my spiritual growth. This man never asked for anything, not even a donation for his time, nothing, and I realized with him saying that he would bring me a Bible, I’d gotten free Bibles from different religious groups that was soliciting their religions at my door. He was someone special, that mysterious Man of God.

If you have ever been in what I call the valley of despair (depression) metaphorically speaking you’d understand what it is I was going through. I’ve often referred to myself as a sensitive. A sensitive, by my definition, is some who is a nurturing, intuitive and deeply and easily affected by emotions derived by people or the environment, externally or mentally and is the kind of person that never will let anyone knows when they are hurting, or in need, because they like to care for others and believe that attention should never be directed toward them. I am touched when I  see people going out of their way to help the less fortunate or just to help someone in need. I am moved with compassion to help others and do right by them. It also breaks my heart to see people hurting one another, being selfish or inconsiderate. My conscious mind would not allow me to do wrong without wanting to make it right some how. It will affect me to the point that I will not sleep or eat, and it will constantly be nagging at me. I feel a deep obligation within my spirit to always want to do and say the right thing, especially when I’d think, ” what would Jesus do, and if it was me, what would I like?” And this sanctified way of being can cause a lot of turmoil in life, simply because of the ingratitude of some people and their evil ways, which can weigh  heavily on a person with a good heart and a conscious mind.

As a Christian, we all know that depression, or any kind of weaknesses, is not something we should ever consider to happen to us, because it would be like saying that we have no faith in the attributes of trusting in God. Long ago and even still today in some churches we are taught that as Christians, we are to be flawless, ever so perfect that we can’t do no wrong. What people fail to realize is that the more you draw closer to God, the more adversities comes after you. But God will never allow the enemy to conquer you as long as you are faithful and a warrior. Jesus was challenged in Matthew 4:1-11, when the devil tempted him to prove that he was the son of God.” Are we also being proven, to be the sons or the daughters of God, by the trials and tribulations of life?

In my dream, I was walking on a lonely road, crying and talking to God about my anguish regarding humanity: why is there so much envy, jealousy, fighting and pain amongst families, churches, communities and race etc. As I was crying, for some reason the clouds in the sky began to gather and it become cloudy and dark. All of a sudden, ”bang!” lightening strikes, and I felt like something  hit me in the back of my head and I fell flat on my face to the ground. When I tried to get up, I noticed right next to me was the Bible lying on the ground and I heard, ” the answers are in the Bible”. The Bible is the biography of humanity and the relationship with God and the constant battle, and struggles for humanity to remain in God’s righteous purpose. As I got up, I picked up the Bible and when I held the Bible in my hand, it was like my spirit absorbed everyone in the Bible who has ever felt what I was feeling towards humanity, from Genesis to Revelation. As I  continued to walk, the sky became clear. I noticed my surrounding, I was in some sort of a valley. I could see the rivers, lakes, trees, flowers and mountains. The beauty of the place reminded me of what I believe the garden of Eden in the Bible would looked like. There was a peace and tranquility, with the bird tweeting, and the butterflies flying around.

I continued walking and talking to God about humanity and what it would take for us to change our ways, to understand his true purpose for us and when all wickedness and evil would end. I heard what sounded like the breaking of dry wood, some sort of crackling, and as I looked up to where I heard the sound coming from, It seemed like it was coming out of the sky, but it was from a tall tree, that a rod fell to the ground in front of me, it look exactly like the rod Moses had in his hand in the movie The Ten commandments. I was very much afraid when I heard a voice said,”this is the Rod of discipline (training, correction, obedience) it is yours walk with it, and the Bible is to navigate into the mind, body and soul of all humanity there is nothing new under the Sun.” Right away I felt I knew those words, ”nothing new under the sun,” had to do with mankind behaviour over centuries, even to me being and feeling the way I do. I continued to walk with the Bible in my right hand and my Rod of discipline in my left. Suddenly I came upon what looked like a hill in the middle of the path I was walking on and there were these people moving about and I couldn’t understand where they came from or why they were all gathered together there. When I got closer, I saw a lion standing on the hill and fearfulness came over me. And it was as though the lion knew my fear, it looked right at me and started running straight for me. I was so afraid I froze; I couldn’t move and the lion jumped right into me. When I say he jumped into me I mean physically into my body and disappeared and all of a sudden I heard a great big roar (the roaring of the lion is the voice of God) of the lion it was coming from my mouth. I woke up, ever so petrified, out of the dream.

God’s interpretation to me was by my works in faith, and through faith. I never been to ministry school, nor have I studied theology but I could preach a good service without having to prepare for it, and I am very good at prophesizing and healing others, I just knew how and what to do. I had another dream where God showed me how to carry the world upon my shoulder without it getting to heavy and burdensome. I never knew that there was a Greek mythology about a Titan named Atlas that was cursed to carry the world on his shoulders for battling with Zeus the king the God’s but after I came across a  fish aquarium that had a man with the earth on his shoulders almost the same way God showed me how to carry the world upon my shoulder. I was so surprised by this revelation because it reminded me of my promise from God. The dream meant that I have a calling to be or I am a Pastor. I was given the wisdom, knowledge and understanding by God to heal myself through healing other. These are dreams I was told by elders (older people in ministry I consider family and I trust) to keep to myself and when I was told that, it didn’t seem that it was something good or to be proud of. It seemed more like something to fear or be ashamed of, that’s how they made me feel about it. For someone like me a sensitive, as I defined earlier, my emotions always run deep. I was and still is in some ways afraid to speak about them, I have this great fear about allowing people to come into my secret place, fear of humanity, I experienced and seen all manner of evil we as human beings are capable of doing to one another.

Today, the reason for me to not feel afraid is that I sit and watch the television and internet with all kinds of people giving revelation to everything that I’ve known, that has been prophesized to me over twenty years now, which thank God I do have witnesses, even some video tapes by certain people as the only evidence that may exist. People will hear what I have to say now, hopefully all over the world, and probably will think or believe I am copying or repeating what someone has already, is doing, done or saying.. The truth is, I should be what the terminology is today a “hater”, someone who hates on someone else, because they had the tenacity to do what they procrastinated or just didn’t get around to doing. But instead it gives me great pleasure, in knowing that everything I’ve ever dreamt, envisioned and prophesized, it all wasn’t crazy or imaginative. Now I have a keen sense for truth, I could discern who is truly one of God’s chosen, especially because I would feel like I am one of them and one with them. It is a funny thing to me, everyone that I believe to be God’s chosen, they all do come together.

” Did you ever have a dream that came true? ” It is called a prophetic dream. Genesis 37:1-10 Joseph in the Bible is one of the first prophetic dreamer. If you have ever experience such dreams then you’d understand what I am speaking about. I have had many of those kind of dreams in my lifetime and I would like to share a few.

I had a dream that I was greeted by a young African child, no more than nine years old in front of a big wooden door. ”Hurry, hurry” he said, “he’s been waiting for you,” as he held onto my hand all excited. He knocked on the gate and it opened all by itself. A gentleman, he didn’t look black or white, his skin was tanned, dressed in a gleaming white gown with a wooden rod in his hand, with long black curly hair, some facial hair and piercing eyes. All I could remember is trying not to look into his eyes. It felt so strange, like he had the ability to draw you in with his eyes, like someone who can hypnotise you. He said, ”sit, let us eat,” we sat alongside a river where he had a fire burning, no dishes or chairs; we sat on the ground. This is all taking place outside in what looks like some kind of a forest, valley or some kind of garden place. He then handed me a brown bowl that looked like a plant, and in it was rice and fish. It was hot to the touch meaning it was just prepared. He said, ”I was waiting for you,” I just couldn’t speak, and he smiled, as though he was reading my mind and knew what I was thinking, and what I was thinking was, ” who is he?” I sat down to eat waiting for a spoon only to realize he began to eating with his fingers as though to show me there’s no spoon; no need for a spoon. I believe once again he was reading my mind. The strangest thing is, as I began eating the food I felt like I knew him and I loved him very much and I couldn’t help but stare at him. I felt like I should not have done that as, remember, there’s something about his eyes. Next thing I knew it was night time, and I felt like I was giving birth, my stomach started to hurt me like I was having contractions and I was surrounded by these tribal woman telling me to push and as I started to push with all my might the scenery changed. I went on this marvelous  journey to the four corners of the earth: east, west, north and south.

I want to state that some of these places and people I had never known existed until I researched them after my dream; thanks to internet and how easy it is to access information. I believe that my dream was some sort of rooted connection to my spirituality and where it all originated and for me to understand why and who I am, for me not to be judgemental to others, regardless of their religion, race, and culture. I had never heard of Zulu tribe, Vishnu, Chief Eagle feather, Hawk peek mountain, Chief papa of the Bantu tribe, or Buddha. I travelled to Asia, Africa, Greece, Egypt, Jerusalem, Atlantis, Bermuda triangle, Japan, and Palestinian. I was taken to the highest mountain to the lowest valley and to the deepest ocean, even into the cosmos.

These places that I’d traveled to, I felt like  I’d lived there, I was one of them, the people. I understood their languages, cultures and their faith practices, and essentially everything about them. I felt like I was someone of importance, because I had gotten to sit among royalties and head of states. One thing they all had in common where I was concerned, was that every time I traveled to a new place I was always greeted by people who said that they were waiting for me, like they knew I was on my way before even I did.

This experience took me back to the past and into the future with amazing wisdom, knowledge and understanding. I learned from the people many things such as healing, to fly [my spirit can leave my body and ascend], marshal arts, even Japanese sword fighting, all of their ritualistic dances and celebrations, to hunt, to be a warrior; a general, the discipline of mind, body and spirit, even astronomy, the angels, God, and the devil [evil forces], and how to overcome and defeat it, music, singing in the supernatural, and writing, ministering, discerning, prophesying  and death and its meaning. They thought me so much, but the most important thing that I’ve learned from them is that religion[faith practices] by everyone was and is based on people intuition of who and what God is. Even though Jesus came and taught us and showed us there are many that have yet to reach that level, including some of those who call upon His name. The knowledge of knowing the existence of God is in all things is so important l. How this is manifested is the key to understanding the wisdom in many practices of the world faiths [religion].

The answer to the question of who the gentlemen was that gave me the fish and rice is as He said, ”I am that I am, who do they say that I am?” Now that lesson has been taught, how well learnt are we, humanity?

This situation with my eyes, led me to take a another look at the story of Saul on his way to Damascus in Acts 9:1-18. “For the light of God is so great it penetrated not just Saul’s sight, but his spirit.” I’ve asked myself, was it really the light alone that affected Saul’s sight? Or is the light of truth that man can’t bear? It is said that “no man can see God and live.” The power is just too consuming to the soul, and here is a great example of that. This man Saul was a murderer of innocent Christian, and what changed him was an encounter with Jesus and the lost of his vision.

I’ve asked myself this question after analyzing the scripture on Saul on the way to Damascus: Is God making a change within my spirit? Is all this happening for God’s purpose?’ I truly believe that this was not an attack from the enemy. It all made sense to me after coming from MegaFest 2015 in Dallas, Texas. The last day I spent there was in hopes of going to the Potter’s House for Sunday service and instead service was at the AA center and Bishop was ill. I was ever so disappointed, but service was still fantastic. Something held me back from leaving right away after service and as it turns out, one of my favorites, an influential spiritual teacher whom I love and adore, was there: Dr. Cynthia James. All I could hear was my sister saying,” look, your favorite lady is here.” I approached her simply to greet and thank her for Wednesday night bible studies and babbled on about how much I adore her, and she stopped me as I was praising her and said,” I don’t want to hear all that, what do you want me to pray with you for?” I was taken aback because I didn’t go to her for that. I was shocked when those words came out her mouth. God knows I don’t even put in a prayer request in private to anyone to pray for me. In fact, I am always the one praying for others, so this was like a Divine intervention for me. I couldn’t speak, I didn’t know what to say, I felt my mouth moving, but no words were coming out of it. I remember thinking or even might have said it, “I don’t know, I am so tired of being afraid” and the tears started to run down my face. She placed her hand on my stomach and all I could remember was her saying is, ” out of your belly.” The whole place went silent and I was in a dark place, but she was with me, she was like a light pulling me out and I could of heard myself praying with a loud voice. The louder I prayed, the light started to shine where we were and I felt like I was ministering with a loud and powerful voice on a the highest mountain with the sun shining ever so brightly. And she was gone. It was only then when I came to, that I could hear myself repeating the words “loose” several times while shaking myself off. My husband and my sister were gone and there were these women surrounding me. I had no clue who they were, so I looked around to find my husband and sister and noticed Doctor Cynthia James was also being surrounded and had been separated from me by some women in the back of me. I felt like I was in a dream. When I’d realized what had just happened, I told the women that surrounded me who turned out to also be Pastors, “Thank you”. When I tried to approached Dr. James to say thank you to her, one of the ministers said to me, ”she’s done with you now,” and I said,” I know, all I want is to tell her thanks.” Dr. James was heavily still in the spirit I had notice and understood, and the minister held my hand and said, ”I’ll tell her for you.” I then found my sister and husband, and my husband had taken pictures of myself and Dr. James. I was so happy. I didn’t expect that; it is not as though we had posed for them. I should had thought about asking her to take a picture with me instead of talking lol.

It was an experience that touched my life in more ways than ever; my mind, body, and spirit. Psalm 130 “Out of the depths have I cried unto thee, O Lord…” So filled with fears, fears because of what the eyes can see; the wickedness and evil that man are capable of doing. Matthew 6:22 “The light of the body is the eye, if the eye is healthy your whole body will be full of light, but if your eyes are not good you will be in darkness.” I believe the reason it is said, ” that the eyes are the window to the soul,” is because of all the senses (to taste, touch, hear, emotions, and to see), God has given man eyes as the confirmation if it all. How would we then be able to enjoy all of creation and its beauty without being able to see it? Everybody wants to be in the light and no one wants to be blind; we want to be able to see, especially as Christians. If we could understand our spirit is the real consciousness of our being. The body is just the evidence of being human. The eyes speaks they talk about your mind, heart and your body when you are sick, that’s why even if you are blind the eyes still cry, because the tears is the washing, purging, renewing and communicating of our spirit to our God all at the same time.

It’s been a while now that my eyes have not been better and it is very hard for me to watch the computer screen as the lighting hurts my eyes and gives me migraine headaches. I was diagnosed with Uveitis a bad infection of the eyes, that should have gotten better after taking some medication but instead it turned out to be a virus that is highly contagious and I just have to let nature take its course for it to get better with help from medications. I could hardly see, my vision has gotten so bad that after this I would need new glasses. I never thought it could have gotten so bad that it hurts to cry. The pain is so severe; because it is a virus, my ear, glands, my eyeballs themselves hurt even to move it around or to bend my head to pick up something. It is like everything I took for granted with my eyes infected is affected. I had looked so ugly with swollen eyes I refuse to go out in public and because I am so contagious, hand sanitizer and Lysol disinfecting wipes are my new best friends even at home and after everything I’ve touched. This is just a mystery to why this happen, I’ve never even worn contact lens in my life that I could blame it on. I’ve had allergies before took allergy medication and all symptoms stopped. I have a great doctor. He has been seeing me on a regular basis and is just a phone call away; if I am concerned about anything to go see him.

I’d gone to the emergency the first time I got up and my eyes were extremely bloodshot and stuck together that icouldn’t open it. My sister accompanied me to the hospital because I couldn’t see and thankfully it was her day off. I dislike going to the hospitals, because I believe you have to dying before the doctors would take you seriously, especially if you are not rich or famous and medicare is free, not all doctors, but some. So I prayed to God that they at the hospital would treat me not just as rich and famous, but His child, a child of the heavenly father with honour and respect that they would give to an earthly king’s child, that’s right, roll out the red carpet and send out the best of the best doctors to represent. I’ve asked and I received. I got the best doctor; he did every test on my eyes and gave me medication and said,” if it gets worst come back immediately.” I went back and was sent to specialist, who’s been seeing me ever since and he’s been fantastic as well.” God is good,” and my healing is coming along in more ways than ever; mind, body and spirit, this is why I am now able to start my blog again. Writing my blog has been a struggle for me from the beginning and I believe this to have been another obstacle in my path,” or was it at all?”

Psalm 119:71- It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I might learn thy statutes.” He put me in darkness so I could see light through Him.” I am not talking about light that is shinning, it is a metaphor for the awareness of His presence within me to have His wisdom, knowledge and understanding of what is going on within and surrounding me.

” What is the trinity of humanity,”one might ask? It is the flesh [body], spirit [the force within a person that is believed to give the body life energy and power] and the divinity. Divinity is the state or quality of being God (a God). In John10:34-35 Jesus answered, ”It is written in your own Law that God said, ‘you are gods’. If he called them gods, unto whom the word of God came, and the scripture cannot be broken.

For many years I believed that I could be just like Jesus. I was taught in Sunday school, be like Jesus and follow Him. My innocent childish ways of thinking lead me to believe that I could really succeed to be just like Jesus; follow the ten commandments, care for others, heal them, feed the hungry, and be a sacrifice. I did, however, clearly understand that I was not going to go on a cross and be crucified like Jesus. Instead, I was to give of myself, by helping and caring for others, even when I was tired and didn’t feel like it. I grew older not only wanting to follow Jesus, but trying to live by every word of the bible like some people and some churches teach. That is when the devil saw my vulnerability and came into my life. I was confused; following and being mislead by a lot of religious people with their interpretation of the bible. When it came to Jesus, I had a personal relationship with Him that was ever so real. I felt like I knew Him and I was there in every part of the bible that was written about Him. It is strange that when I was following Jesus the devil stood on the sideline a lot and every so often he’d tried to come across and run back. But there is something about Jesus and the power he has over the devil. So gradually I’d learn to always put Jesus first then the bible. I was remembering the story of the Sons of Sceva the Jewish High Priest in the book of Acts19:13-16 They traveled around and drove out evil spirits and tried to use the name of the Lord Jesus to do it. They would say to the evil spirit,”I command you in the name of Jesus, whom Paul preaches.” But the evil spirit said to them, ”I know Jesus, and I know about Paul, but you,”who are you?” The man who had the evil spirit in him attacked them and they ran from his house wounded and with their clothes torn off. This to me is so funny, because one of the commandments stipulated not to take the name of the Lord in vain. As 2Timothy3:5 says, Having the form of godliness, but denying the power thereof.

I realized that the access to divinity was taken from us in the garden when Adam and Eve were tempted by the devil and ate of the forbidden fruit. I say this because all hell had broken loose on earth after and the paradise that God had created for us was destroyed. But Jesus, ” oh the sweet name of Jesus,” as Psalm 124:1 If it had not been for the Lord who was on our side, now may Israel say. If it had not been for the Lord.” Jesus was and is, divinity in the flesh. I said [ was], because He is no longer flesh, but is now all divinity. Jesus, the son, father and holy ghost. I know that there is a lot of skepticism about the trinity, but it is up to each individual, the churches to believe or not. For what is written in the bible has many, I would say confusing statements about the trinity, for example, John1:1 In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. John14:9-11 Jesus said, ” He that has seen me has seen the Father, and so how say you then, show us the Father. Believe me that I am in the Father, and the Father in me. In John10:36 Jesus also said, ” I am a blasphemous because I said, I am the son of God.” There’s no confusion with this statement of Jesus declaring He is the son of God. When God had created everything in the world He said, ”let us make man in our image, after our likeness [a god and a spirit]. God: the father, and the son. Humanity[flesh], spirit, and divinity.

I also believe that when God said He would create us in His image and likeness he also meant that we also would have His ability to create for example, housing, cars, washing machines, music, movies, clothing, all the necessities would need to live. Sometimes I believe that God placed all the knowledge in us through Him and all we really need to do is discover it. We don’t create we just discover what God has already placed. God is God alone, He creates and He can destroy. Here is where we have to know our place and not step over boundaries. In everything we are capabke of discovering[create] comes from within us and within us is divinity[God].  And that divinity within us gives us the same abilities as God when He’d say,” let there be.” God’s creative heredity, He has given man. Some people use their divinity for good and some for bad. We use our divinity for good when we trust in God and pray that He would be the one leading us and not we ourselves. We use it for bad whenever we believe to ourselves we are God and there’s none else. Which goes back to garden, and the eating of the forbidden fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil, when the devil tempted Eve to eat the fruit that she would be as God. Genesis 3:5 For God doth know that in the day you eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and you shall be as God. Like God has to fear us being like Him, ”really.”

Psalm8:4-6 What is man, that thou art mindful of him? And the son, of man that thou visited him? For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour. Thou made him to have dominion over the works of thy hands, thou hast put all things under his feet. God is what I call supreme divinity, that not even heaven can be above HIM.

Like siblings, we all may have some abilities, characteristics or similarities to our parents. Some of us more so then the others, whether good or bad. But just imagine some of us human beings having some abilities, characteristics and similarities like our heavenly Father, who is deemed perfect in every way. We may not be perfect, but some of us do, and it is a work in progress to try and maintain it, because of the struggles and battles within us and the world[sin].Ephesians 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Jesus came so He could reconcile us to God and His purpose for humanity, that we could recognize and understand that like Him, we also can be in oneness with God. And to be in oneness with God [divinity], you have to let go of certain human attributes, like anger, fear, hatred, and resentment. Here are some of the requirement of divinity according to Psalm82:3-4 Defend the poor and fatherless, do justice to the afflicted and needy. Deliver the poor and needy, rid them out of the hand of the wicked. I am not saying that Jesus came to make us Gods, God already said we were Gods. Psalm 82:6 ”I have said, “you are Gods, and all of you are children of the most High. I believe He came to ensure we were the humans we were created to be but with the ability to battle against the knowledge of good and evil that we were not to have known about in the first place. If we were to know that such knowledge and the consequences of it really was to destroy our relationship with God, had He not came we also could have destroyed ourselves. We needed to be equipped with wisdom and knowledge to renew our relationship HIM, and to rebuke the devil and his temptations through Jesus.

1John 4:4 Greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world. The birth and the crucifixion of Jesus was very crucial for the salvation of man. His birth filled the earth with the presence of God and His crucifixion filled the earth with the wisdom knowledge, understanding and the will of God. God, Jesus the son, the Holy ghost, and humanity came together in oneness, and that oneness is the catalyst to divinity in man, who believes that He is, worshipped and praised, the son crucified and resurrected, sent into the world, accepted, rejected ”Matthew16:13 Whom do men say that I the son of man am? And Peter answered and said, ”Thou art the Christ, the Son of the living God.”

Matthew26:41 Watch and pray, that you enter not into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. How did this all happen? In the beginning of the creation when God formed man of the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life[the spirit]. He said unto Adam, ”of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it, for in the day that you eat to it, you shall surely die.” Genesis2:7 and 17. But they were both tempted. I say “both” were tempted  because Adam called her bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh, because she was taken out of him ; and they became one. [Genesis2:23,24] They were tempted by the devil and did eat the forbidden fruit, and for this reason the war of the spirit and body began. But there is and has always been an instigator between those two; the devil.

I believe that God’s intention for us was to be somewhat like Him, but to oversee the things of the world He created. God said, ”Let us make man in our image, [a person or thing of close resemblance] after our likeness,[a semblance or guise] and let them have dominion over the fish, birds, cattle, creeping things, and over all the earth” [Genesis1:26] God is a spirit, John4:24 tells us. So if we are created in His image and likeness so was Adam and Eve before they had eaten of the forbidden fruit. Adam and Eve, I believe, were created with innocence and purity and so such was the spirit within them. They didn’t know that they were naked and they had no shame until God called onto them after they had eaten the fruit.

What people don’t realize is that because of sin, from the temptation and eating of the forbidden fruit, there arose in each and everyone of us , a division within, and without us which is spirit and flesh. It has become a battle for both the spirit and flesh to live in one accord. The serpent came that he may attack the divinity [the spirit] that God had placed in man, in His likeness and image. The true meaning of spirit to me is to be divine. I believe that Adam and Eve even though they were created from the dust of the ground they were light beings. Jesus, when he took Peter, James and John and was transfigured before them, His face did shine as the sun and his raiment was white as the light. Jesus changed on mountain of transfiguration Matthew17:1-9

The spirit only enters into the flesh once the baby is out of the mother’s womb. Take a deep breath, yes the spirit enters into the body at the first breath of a baby. The reason I say this is because while the baby is in the mother ‘s womb, the baby and the mother are one in spirit and flesh and remain that way until separation. What is  the definition of spirit, it is the nonphysical part of a person that is the seat of emotions and character; the soul. The Merriam Webster dictionary definition is: the force within a person that is believed to give the body life, energy, and power. The inner quality or nature of a person.First we must understand that spirit has no gender [male or female].It is only when it enters into the flesh [body] and with our physical eyes can we see, our hands can we touch and our ears can we hear whether it’s a boy or girl. The conflict of homosexuality, transgender and any physical or mental illnesses of the flesh is caused by the battling between the spirit and the flesh. One thing I must say is that even though spirit has no gender, it has a forms, good and bad or should I say negative and positive. The contrast between the negative and the positive is what brings life here on earth into existence,  amd they cannot exist without each other. God did not created us entirely with of spirit, we were created out of the ground of the earth, so the earth and us arenjoined together as one because we came out of it, like Eve who became one with Adam because she was created from one of his ribs. If we were created as the angels, spiritual beings of the heavenly foundation, I believe we wouldn’t suffer with the things we doas a result of our earthly foundation.

I believe that the tree of knowledge of good and evil wasn’t for us because of our inherent inability to handle such power. The spirit moves like the wind and the ray of light. The spirit moves swiftly and the body takes its time. We can see this because the body only grows in stages, like it takes nine month for a baby to be formed in its completeness. Adam was as spiritedly form, he didn’t take nine month and so was Eve. We were created part earth[body] and part spirit. When we die our body goes back to the earth and our spirit goes back to the creator [God]. Jesus came so that He can reclaim that which belongs unto God into oneness with Him. Psalm 24:1 tells us, ” The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof, the world, and they that dwell therein.”

The story of Job wasn’t about Jobs wealth, physical body and faith in God only, it was also about his spirit. The devil was using what was around him, [family, friends and wealth] his emotional and physical body [attack of the body with diseases and his mind with vain thoughts] to show God once again, like the eating of the fruit in the garden that the creation of the spirit of man is weak and can be easily persuaded. What God didn’t do with Adam, He sure did with Job by first forming a hedge around him from the devil and installing in him spirit that cannot be moved or persuaded by the devil. God had drawn the line to the devil where man was concern in the story of Job, the code no access as literary spoken into todays vocabulary for the meaning of hedge, blockage or you are blocked from entering into.

When Jesus asked his disciples,”whom do you say that I am?” And Simon Peter answered Him saying, “Thou art the Christ, the Son of the living God. Jesus responded with, ”Blessed art thou, Simon Barjona for flesh and blood had not revealed it unto you, but my Father which is in Heaven. Upon this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.”[Matthew15-18]

For us to understand the purpose of the creation of the church, we must first understand who, why and what of Jesus’ arrival to Earth. The who, is the world and they that dwell there in. Why? For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through him might be saved.[John3:17] What for? To show and teach us the will of God. Jesus laid the foundation with his birth, resurrection and everything that took place in between. He is the physical manifestation of the will of God. And the will of God is the basis in which the churches was to be created not that of man. Man cannot save themselves, only by the will of God can we be saved.

In the book of Revelation chapters 1,2,and 3 where John was given prophetic messages to send out to seven churches telling them of God’s judgment on them and His will. He didn’t send a teaching lesson, they were given a direct command. Jesus is the one that is speaking to John and explaining to him the things in which he is seeing and the things in which to come. When I’d read these chapters in revelation about the churches Jesus is speaking to through John, I can’t help, but think what would Jesus have to say to the churches of today. I believe that quite like when Jesus pointed out to the churches all that was wrong with them and needed to be changed, it is for all churches today to check themselves in comparison to what they believe like those churches, if they are doing according to God’s will or their own. For example Revelation2:2-5 His message to Ephesus, about how hard they work with patience and the fact that they don’t tolerate evil men, tested those who say they are apostles but are liars, and they suffered for His sake and never gave up. But yet they have fallen, they don’t love him as they did at first, repent and go back to loving Him as they did.

Whenever I hear man proclaim that,” it is their church,” makes me quaver in my spirit. If they only understand the meaning of the church they wouldn’t be saying that. And for the churches that has names that has nothing to do with what the church represent or its purpose, it is like 2 Timothy 3:5 Having the form of Godliness, but denying the power thereof. When they say my congregation, for me I think that man sometimes forget that God is the one in control and gave him the honor and respect like Jesus always declares. John 12:44 He that believe on me, believe not on me, but on him that sent me. John 6:37 All that the Father give me shall come to me. The congregation is the Lords. I am not speaking of all churches being like this, but for the few that are.

Whom would or could we say really needed the church, is it the so called righteous Christians or sinners? Matthew 9:12-13 Jesus said, ”people who are well do not need a doctor, but only those who are sick. Go and find out what is meant by the scripture that says,” it is kindness that I want, not animal sacrifices. I have not come to call respectable people, but outcast.” History hasn’t changed, like in the day of Jesus with the Pharisees and the Sadducees, there are religious people today who are so self righteous and know it all when it come to God that they miss the true understanding of the teachings and will of God. Because of their ignorance they close the church doors on the ones that God sent to them, who really need to get in. Romans 2:11 For there is no respect of persons with God. And I would truly believe that the church,” God’s church” should be the same.  Any and everyone no matter what should be welcome with no discrimination who is looking for solace, wisdom, knowledge and understanding in the almighty God.

I remember going to Sunday school and being taught this song by my Sunday school teacher. It was one of  the first songs I’ve ever learned, it is so easy to remember because you’d just repeated one verse over and over again, and that was all we were taught. Never understanding the meaning of a sunbeam, all I knew is that anything to do with Jesus was good, and I liked singing the song.

Almost thirty years went by without me hearing that song again and then I was invited to a prayer meeting and asked to start the meeting with a prayer by the minister who looked at me and began to sing the song, ”A sunbeam, a sunbeam Jesus wants you for a sunbeam.” I looked at him in fear and also disbelief. Fearful, because back in the days I was very shy, I never liked being up front in the midst of lots of people. Even today it scares the life out of me, just the thought of it! ”What if I’d say or do the wrong thing? I would be so embarrassed,” I’d constantly think to myself. Being in the back is my safe place when I’m around people. I don’t like fronting, and being the center of attention; I truly despise it. I was in disbelief because, of all the songs this minister chose to sing to me, it was one I haven’t heard in forever, old time song that I only heard in Sunday school and loved so much. Here I am all grown up, a woman now and for the first time, and as shocked as I was, I heard, within his singing, God calling me to ministry. I’ve always wanted to be like Jesus, to care for people and to heal them. But I never saw myself as a preacher, minister, pastor, ”no way in heaven or on earth, that is not my dream ever in life to do.” Believe it or not, that is some of what I was saying in my head when the minister was singing. He saw my reluctance and somehow could read my mind. He started to minister to me in the presence of everyone,” so embarrassing,” I thought to my self. He said, “the meaning of a sunbeam is God is calling you to be a light, a beacon for His purpose in the world where there is darkness,” and as he continued to speak something came over me and I fell to my knees and started praying like I never prayed before in my life. I don’t even recall when the gentleman stopped speaking when I’d fell to my knees. I believe the seed of ministry was planted in my soul at that very moment. We had a wonderful prayer meeting that day and everyone who attended walked away ever so blessed and uplifted.

I cannot bear witness of myself or of the things that I’ve been capable of doing through the Almighty. But He has sent people to me just for that purpose. God doesn’t give us favor so we can be proud and boastful over others. God wants to do a good work within us so that our light will shine and others can glorify Him for it. Matthew 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in Heaven. Hebrews 13:21 God make you perfect in every good work to do His will, working in you that which is well pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Philippians 1:6 He which begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ.

I could speak of the many things that God made possible in our lives. I use the word ‘our’ because I am including myself in these testimonies as well as others. He is able to heal us, and heal us through others. He brought the dead back to life and through others He brought back the dead as well. He’s work all kind of miracles in our lives and through others, He has done the same. Matthew 19:26 Jesus said,”with men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.

I was taught how to pray, fast, worship and come into a sacred place with God, as Psalm 91:1 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. God has prepared the table for me in the presence of my enemies,[Psalm23:5] I will not be hungry in the day of famine and all my enemies will see His blessings upon me. Songs of Solomon 4:15 God has given me the fountain of gardens, a well of living water [Jesus] John 4:10. Psalm 23:5 God anointed my head with oil, my cup run over, because He has chosen, God has called me to be empress, for His will.

I became a warrior and a general in the army of the Lord. I had to be taught to defend myself against evil forces of this world. You can’t be ranked no less than a general for anything less would cause you to lose the battle. The fight consist of every weapons and forms of fighting even to prayer. I am also known as a prayer warrior. Certain warfare requires diligence in fasting and praying. Like Ephesians 6:11 Put on the whole armour of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. God doesn’t settle for mediocrity in His army; He forms you into who He created you to be and with strength and power of your own you become like Him mighty in acts and deeds.

Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengthen me. I can be and do anything I choose as long as it is in agreement and accordance to the will of God.