Fantastic, amazing, soulful, breathtaking, masterful, evocative — and the list could go on forever. That is how I would describe Michael Jackson. I was never simply a fan. To me, he was far more than an entertainer, artist, or superstar. Just as Michael Jackson was never an ordinary performer, my connection to him was never ordinary admiration.

From the age of six, watching The Jackson 5 cartoons and listening to their music, I felt drawn to him in a way I could never fully explain. By the time I reached puberty, I had already decided I was going to marry Michael Jackson. Childish as that may sound now, it reflected how deeply connected I felt to him even then.

Watching this movie “Michael” recently brought all of those emotions rushing back. I cried because I realized just how much I still miss him and how much I truly loved this man. From childhood, I always felt as though his heart and soul somehow resonated with my own. I felt spiritually connected to him. I never saw him merely as a celebrity or global icon. Through his music, lyrics, and humanitarian spirit, I saw someone who was genuinely a gift from God to the world.

His music felt prophetic, inspirational, and healing. In times of struggle, confusion, and pain — much like the state of today’s world — his songs carried messages of love, unity, compassion, and hope. They reached people across every race, culture, and nation.

In the Bible, 1 Samuel 16:14–23 tells us that when an evil spirit troubled King Saul, David would play the harp and soothe him, bringing him peace. In many ways, Michael Jackson’s music did something similar for millions of people. Today, the world feels overwhelmed by anger, division, hatred, and spiritual darkness, and sometimes I feel as though we need Michael Jackson’s music now more than ever to remind us what compassion, humanity, and healing sound like.

His music soothed my spirit many times throughout my life. At times, listening to his songs felt almost like prayer. To this day, I believe there is no other artist whose music has touched the entire world on such a deep emotional and spiritual level regardless of race, ethnicity, language, or culture.

When I see public figures comparing themselves to Jesus Christ or portraying themselves as spiritual saviors, I cannot help but reflect on Michael Jackson differently. No, I do not believe Michael was Jesus, nor would I ever place him above Christ. But I do believe there are parallels in the suffering he endured.

All my life, I watched Michael Jackson pour love into humanity and strive to make the world a better place. I also watched as the world tried to break him. Like Jesus, he faced relentless public humiliation, false accusations, ridicule, mockery, and betrayal. They called him “Wacko Jacko.” They accused him of terrible things. They attempted to destroy not only his reputation, but his spirit.

Yet time after time, he endured.

I believe he was covered by the prayers of his mother, his family, and millions of people around the world who genuinely loved him. Still, the attacks never truly stopped. Sometimes I wonder if perhaps God called him home because humanity would have continued trying to crucify him emotionally and spiritually over and over again.

Michael Jackson had one of the most compassionate hearts the world has ever seen. His pain was visible behind the smile, behind the performances, behind the fame. I often think that carrying the emotional weight of humanity eventually became too much for him.

I remember the excitement surrounding the This Is It tour announcement. I rushed home, changed clothes, and sat in front of the television binge-watching Michael Jackson videos for hours. I was so energized and emotional that I could not sleep. I even got my husband caught up watching the videos with me before he eventually fell asleep while I kept watching.

Then I remembered the day Michael died.

I cried inconsolably while watching the news coverage. Every channel was covering his death. His music played everywhere. The entire world seemed to stop for a moment. During my dramatic breakdown, my daughter told my husband to comfort me. He looked over and jokingly replied, “Why should I? She’s crying over another man.”

Even through my tears, I had to laugh. In that moment, I realized just how much my husband had endured throughout the years because of my lifelong love for Michael Jackson. I used to joke with him that Michael was the only man I would ever leave him for.

Now, after midnight, I find myself awake reflecting on the question that still lingers years later: Why him? Why did God take him?

What settled in my spirit was this: perhaps he had completed what he came into this world to do.

Just as Jesus said on the cross, “It is finished,” perhaps Michael Jackson’s purpose here had also reached its completion. I truly believe that even in death, his spirit, message, and music continue to illuminate hearts and remind humanity of the goodness we once had but too often took for granted.

In a world increasingly filled with cruelty, division, selfishness, and despair, Michael Jackson’s voice still reminds people to heal the world, care for children, protect the planet, and love one another. His influence did not end with his death. In many ways, it only became immortal.

Sometimes it feels as though nothing truly good is meant to last forever in this world. The pure-hearted often seem to suffer the most, and sometimes the brightest lights leave us too soon. Jesus was only thirty-three years old when He died.

I still miss Michael Jackson deeply, and I can only imagine the pain his family continues to carry. My prayer is that the Lord continues to bless and strengthen them with peace, love, healing, and unity.

Michael Jackson may be gone from this earth, but for millions around the world, his music, spirit, and message will never die.