Love unconditional is fantastic for those who are not sensitive or emotional. But in a world where everything has a price nothing is for free we take into account. When you can overlook the cost and do whatever it takes to stand for peace and righteousness all for the will of God, your reward is not after you die but while you are living. God sees and knows everything so you are not going to be rewarded by those you’d expect, but like angels, a stranger will be sent by God.

As I spent years watching and observing humanity I realized why on the cross Jesus cried out, ” forgive them father for they know not what they do” Luke 23:34. Some of us human beings have mental issues when it comes to perceiving right and wrong, good and bad; completely oblivious especially about spiritual things. We are arrogant and ignorant enough to believe we know everything. Everything about our behavior has to do with our mindset and our egos.

It takes bold courage, tenacity, resilience and confidence in one self to be able to stand with an emotional and sensitive heart. You don’t have to be bitter, cold or heartless for your heart not to be broken. You just have to be strong will to overcome the pain and move on. Not allowing it to disable you mentally. Having feelings is not a sin. Disappointment, along with heart breaks and aches are all part of life, especially if you’re loving, caring and compassionate person. Sometimes you have to pray God that same love that lead Jesus to the cross be in you to survive in this life as a Christian.

Whenever we feel that we have suffered ingratitude just remember Jesus and what he had to suffer for us all on the cross and yet loving mankind. Ingratitude does hurt!

Memory of my first Christmas was unconventional besides going to church on Christmas eve. We had no Christmas tree or presents. I can recall my aunt doing a lot of house cleaning. The house was spotless. New curtains, furnitures rearranged and the aroma of cooking and baking filled the air. While all us kids were outside playing after some time we would be called in to have our bath and tidy up for dinner. Dinner was amazing, my aunt cooked a lot of food but my favorite was macaroni pie and chicken. Family, friends and our neighbors all will drop by bringing food and drinks. Everyone lived so close it was easy to walk over to our house. After dinner all the kids would go outside and be given a lite up sparkler. Nothing could of prepare us for the surprise we had for desert as we all went inside after the sparklers went out. Even though we had all kinds of baked goods the highlight of our Christmas was getting to eat apples and grapes, what most people take for granted was a joy for us. While other children at Christmas look forward to opening up presents we looked forward to  eating grapes, apples and sparklers.

I learned at an early age that Christmas was about family and friends getting together having dinner and going to church. Church was the one of the first things to be at concerning Christmas and for me it was Sunday school where I learned the true meaning of Christmas. One of the first time in my life I could remember getting my first Christmas present was at a church we were invited to. They had so much presents and everyone in the church got something and you were called up to chose your own gift on a table, not Christmas tree. And I could also remember how much I loved the idea of getting a present for the first time everything was decorated so beautifully wrapped in boxes my curiosity peaked to find out what is in them . All I understood is the presents was symbolic to the gifts brought to Mary and Joseph at Jesus birth in the manger, especially by the Three wise men.

When it came to getting the gifts the children when up first to chose and was always first because after all it’s about baby Jesus. And I never forgot when it was my turn to chose. I looked for the biggest present because I thought maybe there would be so much more things in it after witnessing someone else opened up a small box with two gifts inside. I learned my lesson on greed that day for sure. The gift wasn’t toys but things your family could use like a Bible, books and pen, towels, soaps etc. So I choose the biggest present ever and it’s so vivid in my mind today. I couldn’t wait to go home and opened it up with my family. My sister went after me and picked up an envelop instead which I didn’t pay any attention to on the table my goal was the biggest gift there was. Topical kid, lol. Got home everyone just as curious as I was to open up the gift, that was so big I couldn’t even carry it myself. When my aunt began to open it up it was layers and layers of wrapping and boxes, and finally at the end four rolls of toilet paper, everyone burst out in laughter. Yes, that was definitely not what I had expected. My siblings and cousin were on the floor holding their tummies, crying in laughter. My aunt held back hers and smiled and said, don’t bother with them this is very good. You see back in those days we had a outhouse (toilet) and back in those days to have toilet paper was a luxury. Everyone got great gifts nothing like I did especially my sister who chosed the envelop she got money, five or ten dollars and that was like winning the lottery jackpot five or ten dollars was a lot of money back then. I could still hear the laughter of everyone in my head and still today I myself can’t help but laugh, when back then I felt I wanted to cry.

I never learnt about Santa Claus and Christmas trees until I moved to Canada. Living with another aunt and uncle Christmas was not about cleaning house and church as much as it was about believing in Santa and having that tree up decorated beautifully with so much gifts beneath it. It was magical your imagination of this Santa Claus bring you presents, having to be good and not naughty. Waiting to get a glimpse of him coming down the chimney putting out the milk and cookies. It was all about toys lots and lots of toys anything you can imagine, but there was nothing like getting my very first doll that looked just like me. Waking up to hot warm home made oatmeal that tasted like cookie my uncle made with raisins. Quaker oats couldn’t touch his oatmeal recipe, “it the bomb” as my kids would say. No matter what friends and family always got together to eat, laugh and create wonderful memories. I could never remember thanks be to God back then ever having a bad or sad Christmas.

Moving to Canada definitely change my prospective on the meaning of Christmas. Then going to school we had Christmas parties before the holidays with gift exchange. And at an early age I realized that if you’re given a gift some how you feel obliged to return the favor. And the gift giving thing went on overload in me. I remember it was my step mother who introduced being a Santa Claus to me and also made me her elf at an early age, going shopping with her to make sure everyone and I mean everyone of my siblings, dad, even neighbors and some friends we would give gifts. And I was hooked on the gift giving thing cause I saw how happy it made everyone and how stressful it felt when you forgot some who had given you one. Living with my dad and stepmother there was no friends, family or neighbors, church or the extra cleaning of the house, it was just us alone as a family for Christmas. It wasn’t the same, but we had gifts and got everyone exactly what they would asked for. My stepmother taught us to bake special cakes and bread and cook for our family for Christmas and it was so much fun, but just us and we would eat dinner after. One of the first Christmas spent with my stepmother and father she maxed out the credit cards which after all the fun was done and the reality of the festive season was over. I recalled if being the first time I knew their was no Santa Claus. I heard my dad yelling at my stepmother for spending all the money on Christmas gifts, his exact words, “you like playing Santa Claus!” my heart was broken. I was devastated for her, because I was with her doing all the shopping till the stores closed and it felt so good helping making others happy. I was so caught up myself it didn’t hit me, where is this Santa Claus and why isn’t he the one to bring the presents? My out look on the meaning of Christmas surely changed from then on.

Christmas to me was wonderful season and feeling, because I am a giver and I love to give. I would always try to make sure I never left anyone out. When began to have a family of my own I wanted my children to experience Christmas like I did when I first came to Canada, with the Christmas tree, Santa Claus and presents, lots of them. That was short lived when one day a friend of the family who grew up with myself and siblings like a sister to whom I was Godmother to one of her two children. And I would never forget this as long as I live. I was playing Santa Claus as usual and so proud of myself when I bought her kids gifts, lots and lots of gifts because I do believe Christmas is about and for the little children, especially the giving of presents. My girlfriend kindly walked up to me as I placed the last gift on the floor of her living room and said, “Joey let this be the first and last time sis, cause Christmas is not about gifts; material things. You being here to eat with us is more than anything you can give materially, please don’t be angry.” I didn’t know how to respond other than, “okay, I am sorry.” She smiled at me and replied, “there’s nothing to be sorry about you didn’t do anything wrong. I just learned something so important about this season they celebrated the birth of Christ and everyone is going about it wrong. People, business people especially is making the birth of our Lord and savior a money making business which has no significance to the reason Christ birth is so important. They don’t even mention him, instead there is Santa Claus this imaginary being. I was just as devastated as when I found out my stepmother was the only Stanta Claus and there was no other.

The true meaning of Christmas has been the presence of love ones through out my life. But what my girlfriend had to say took away all my misconceptions of gifts being one of the most integral part of it. We can’t have the celebration of Christmas without understanding it’s meaning. According to the Bible it’s about love, sacrifice, deliverance, redemption and servitude to the will of God. There is no written scripture to justify the way the world celebrates the birth of Christ with gifts. Many people don’t go to church or even know what Christmas is truly all about, but look forward to the holidays and all the perks that goes with it like parties, dinners and gifts. I love that it is the spirit of giving, but so many people give because of feeling obligated especially to someone who has give them. Half the time unless it money people are regifting to others what they had gotten and had no use for. I love the idea of people donating money and food to banks and collecting toys for the less fortunate children. But I realize there are those who capitalized on one of our most holy day. Once again man and our freedom to chose, so we chose to do things our way the only way we know how.

Thank God for His way not being like ours. I could just imagine instead of God giving his son to the world just giving another tree to eat of or material things, could be anything He is God who can do all things especially the impossible to cleanse us from our sins. But instead it was his presence that made all the difference. Nothing could of replaced presence. Look how far humanity came. Sin was supose to destroy us, but now through Him we have grace. We are able to do mighty things through him now all because of His presence.

There are certain people who are overlooked; who are they? Often the people within our immediate circle, acquaintance or stranger. They are always in the background of things being humble, pushing everyone forward to their destiny. Never complaining always happy to help others in need and to see them succeed. Many times not even recognized for their services in which a lot of people is need of. So many of these kind hearted people are taken for granted and we must give them the accolades they are deserving of. Don’t wait till they are gone to sing their praises of how wonderful they were.

I do believe that many people are very entitled especially in our world today. Some are aware of it and some completely oblivious. Entitlement is always about self, so therefore we overlook the kindness of others as though they are obligated, which is ever so wrong. Luke 6:31 “Do to others as you would have them to do to you.” We should all put this into practice totally in our relations with others. We ourselves have to be accountable for being completely aware of how we treat others in our actions and what we say. Be courteous!

Psalm 30:5 by King David who killed Goliath the Philistine by a sing shot, 1Samuel 17. I often define the night as life because as we know it to be is consistent with trials and tribulations we go through. The morning I define as our Heaven, going to our eternal home with God where there’s no more pain or suffering.

Weeping, our sorrows and woes over sickness, lost of a love one, finances, relationships, our jobs, family issues, whatever may disrupt our peace, which is inevitable in this life as we all know it, with our highs and lows of emotions. Always fighting to gain balance and take control, not allowing it to get away on us. Weeping can also be define as the bad in life, our hell

Joy, our joy that seems to last like a flicker of a light. Why does everything good seems to not last long in our lives. The balance is not needed here, it’s the climax that needs to be maintained. Joy can last just as long as weeping or even longer in the world, but we can’t grasp it simply because anything that makes us uncomfortable in life we want it to immediately stop and anything that makes us feel good we want it to last forever, but seems short lived. Joy can be defined as good, our Heaven.

Weeping may endure for a night and the night sometimes can be long. Joy comes in the morning no bad things last forever. But let’s be realistic the night will always come and so will the morning. Through the hard times which is the weeping, look forward for a time of rest and renewal.

Did Jesus birth, death and resurrection changed anything when there is still sin in the world? “Yes it did” is the answer to that question. Romans 6:23 The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. Jesus presence to humanity was not just the manifestation of the word of God, but also the wisdom, knowledge, and understanding of his will.

Mankind had fallen to sin, but Jesus came, caught us, and pulled us out. John 16:33 In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. If we truly understand the word of God, for sure we would stand firmly in the authority of it and no devil in hell could deceive and move us.

The enemy is the continually trying to convince a lot of people that the Messiah is still yet to come and in his coming only then the world and it’s systems will change. The change has already been taken place. For those who are spiritually inclined you’d understand and know this. Christianity has exploded to the four corners of the world as was said in the gospel, “go and make disciples of all nations” Matthew 28:16-20. Everyone in the world today knows who’s Jesus. Philippians 2:10-11 At the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

For three days Jesus wrestle with death, the flesh and the devil, and the third day he resurrected. Unlike Jonah Jesus didn’t have to wait for God to let him out. Jesus had to unlock creation to get himself out. Why unlock creation? Unlock creation because God didn’t decide to change it. After all when it was completed God said, “it was good” and in saying so it was sealed and locked, Genesis 1:31. Death wasn’t part of God’s plan in creation, it came after the fall of man; Adam and Eve eating the forbidden fruit. As for the devil, he had to remind him who’s the boss.

Best experience ever for a first time cruiser, lol. So it’s was our 25th Anniversary and what a way for myself and husband to have celebrated, other than with our spiritual family, and what a blessing with lots of fun, lessons learnt and much spiritual insight for those who had eyes to see. I saw the Lord move in a mysterious way and his wonders, he did perform.

I behold a faithful family allowing by Faith, to let strangers from all over the world to vacation with them in such an intimate way, a cruise out in the ocean with a limited amount of people, made me feel like my husband and I was important that God made it possible for us to be in such a place, at such a time like that, wow! We walked passed each other like old friends, danced, laughed and ate, “pinch me I thought, is this all a dream.” This family to me is as important as royalty, but yet humble themselves to be with us all. And to think the matriarch of the family was very ill, but made sure she showed up as to not disappoint and it was plain to see that she was truly not well. Being someone who suffers from a chronic disease I can only give her props and lots of prayers for her and her family for showing such great, love, respect and morals to all that loves them for her showing up regardless.

I love this family very much because the Lord has revealed to me that everything they do, they do it with love to go to the extreme to make the world a better place for everyone, literally everybody, in all that they do. And I love and appreciate and thank God for allowing me in to see for myself the kind of people they truly are. There are some real ungrateful, complaining, haters out in the world that just don’t get it and like the Pharisees and Sadducees try to persecute and hurt them like they did Christ. What they have to put up with and still smile and love people I commend them for it, for I know God has to have covered them with an extrodinary anointing to stand; stand unified, and strong in Jesus name. “I pray all blessings of the Lord to continue to cover them for all eternity, Amen!”

So many of us woman are spiritual Queens and have no idea. When we think of wanting to being a queen as identified with it’s earthly meaning like the queen of England, Elizabeth, with fame, fortune and servants, every little girl wish they could be like that, but it’s difficult. Being a queen is not like what we read about or see in the movies. The Merriam-webster dictionary meaning of a queen is: the wife or widow of a king, a female monarch, a woman eminent in rank, power, or attractions, a goddess or a thing personified as female and having supremacy in a specified realm. I believe God’s meaning of a queen, his queen, is according to the character of Blessed virgin Mary: she’s God loving, fearing, faithful, compassionate, kind, helpful and caring to others, woman of sacrifice, authority and power, but yet humble and walk with grace, a grace is infused with morals. This grace in which is spoken is not favor, but a way of being, the moral and ethical way of being, representation of Godliness within. If it can be grasp in your mind of understand?

Mary had the virtues needed for God to come through into the world, like Noah and his family for God to save to replenished the earth. We look into the world for people we admire an want to be like, but the world can be deceptive not everything is what it seems, there’s always a hidden truth needing to be revealed. So for this reason I ask God to give me wisdom, knowledge and understanding, the eyes to see and the ears to hear and discernment.

The only one I’d want to be like in this earth even today is Mother Mary. Why because being a heavenly queen, has more to offer than an earthly one, and chosen to to help change the world in the biggest way ever and actually said yes to the Lord, when asked. How awesome is That!

We the children of God are so spoiled and we can’t see it. We want and want, get what we want and sometimes it turn out to be a curse rather than a blessing for us and we’re never a satisfied. It all started with Adam in the garden who was given the tasked by God to name all the animals paired off with a companion (Genesis 2:18-20) God realized it was not right for man to be alone so he made a help meet for Adam. I believed that Adam went to God saying, he wanted to be paired with someone like himself as the animals. God had already prepared to make him a companion, but wanted Adam to first form an deeper relationships with him that wouldn’t ever be unbroken. Adam being flesh and God being spirit was his problem and God give to him what his heart desired. From the very beginning God always granted whatever was asked of him, Adam got a companion Eve from the Lord. And even though there was consequences to him getting what he wanted such as Eve his companion who was tempted to eat from the forbidden tree by the serpent and then gived him also to eat in which he did. The results for their action is they both were thrown out of paradise where every thing was once provided for them, now have to work hard for their life and was eventually going to die.

I often wondered why Adam never put up a fight by insisting not to eat from the forbidden tree. He was the first to know about all of God’s creations and the dose and don’t to have taught Eve. Adam said, the woman whom he had been given, gave him and he did eat (Genesis 3:12). Instead of resisting he did just like she did without a fight ate from the forbidden tree not understanding the meaning of good and evil or death, but wanting their eyes to open and to be like God. Like innocent children wanting to be a grown up Adam and Eve were disobedient.

I examining the scriptures in Exodus and Numbers about the Israelites in the wilderness with Moses. Their behavior was no different than Adam and Eve. But unlike Adam and Eve they fought back, but for unrighteousness reasons. They complained about being taken in the wilderness to die when the Pharaohs was after them, the bitter water at Marah, that they left Egypt to thirst to death, eating only manner and not meat, they complained about Moses staying on the mountain to long so they made a golden calf to be their God, they murmured and complained so much that God sent a fire to consume some of them, and they spoke out against both Aaron and Moses. The wilderness should had become for the enslaved Israelites the new Eden the place where the Lord provided everything they needed like he did for Adam and Eve in taking care of their well being. The Israelites exasperated God so much that he threatened to had kill them. Being spoiled and throwing tantrum in wanting and wanting, then getting what they wanted, and never satisfied. Their behavior I would think had nothing to do with innocence, but sin within.

It doesn’t make any sense why the Israelites acted the way they did, when they saw the mighty hand of the Lord displayed against the Egyptian, the people feared the Lord and put their trust in him and in Moses his servant (Exodus 14:31) They were delivered from four hundred years of slavery and all they could do is complain that being enslaved was better than their freedom in the wilderness. We can now understand why man has to be saved by Grace. Our flaw and frailty doesn’t allow us to do anything other than to be obedient to the word of God to get us through the life we are given.

Deejay Khalid hit song we all like the idea of winning, it’s becomes our theme song for our life. We all want to win, win, no matter what, but God sometimes requires for us to lose for his purpose. Look at Moses, he could of given up on falling his calling by becoming the Prince of Egypt next in line to being the Pharaoh marrying a princess instead of a shepherd woman. Joseph could of had his vengeance on his brothers for what they had done to him and Jesus could of call down the angel to fight against those who prosecuted and brutally beat him and then crucified him.

Are we willing to lose for the sake of God’spurpose, giving up what could make us a winners. You’re in the ring to win not lose. But look at Jesus, if we truly want to follow him, stepping down serving when you should be on a thrown being served. When you know you can fight and win, but you throw the fight for God and let the others win that’s what Jesus had done for us. It’s not for you to win sometimes, but for you to trust God to do his will when you fight hard and still lose. As a child of the most High God winning or losing is not up to us, but whatever is the will of God.

I do not know what’s wrong with Christians who’s believing that Jesus’s coming is going to be so great this time. What’s wrong with you people didn’t you learn from our ancestors who believed the same thing and look what happened. This time we might be the ones crucified. Isn’t it better to not know and to know and do wrong?

We should be fearful after all the Pharisee and scribes believed themselves to have known who the messiah would be, and Jesus definitely was not to their expectation of what they believed. And surely the messiah would be in their company and not who they’d considered sinners, and unworthy.

If Jesus present in the earth the first time was to save man kind by bring us kingdom rules and being the sacrificial lamb to deliver us from sin. We should be worried how well learnt are we now, and are we trying, truly trying to be obedient to all we were taught, are we being honest to ourselves as to our relationship with the Lord or are we faking it and faking it to others as well. Remember, “God is not to be mocked” Jesus taught us, walk with us, healed us, fed us, preformed miracles, made the impossibles in our lives possible, and give us specific rules to follow like love the Lord God with all your heart, mind and soul and love your neighbors as yourself Matthew 22:36-40. Are we following and being obedient?

Don’t be fooled, saved by grace is for all the hopeless people in the world who can’t help but be the way they are and do the things they do. And as a called persons of God you have to be able to stand in faith like Job, no matter what happens to you in life. You cannot be a presumptuous sinner believing you can do whatever and you’ll still be saved by Grace. Being saved by Grace is what Jesus life death and resurrection had given us as sinners. In other words we are helpless, and hopeless in in anything we believe we could try to do to be saved but doesn’t work, because we can’t help but make mistake.

Matthew 7:21-23 (NIV) Jesus teaching of True and False Disciples “Not everyone who says to me,”Lord, Lord; will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the ones who does the will of my father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ” Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name performed many miracles?” Then I will tell them plainly, “I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!” I can only guess Jesus is talking about sinners, the one who play God themselves by being judging, jury and prosecutor of others, hating, showing no love and not treating others the way they’d like to be treated, etc. I guess grace wouldn’t be given under these circumstances when he cast you away from him.

Come on people can’t you see it’s reason to be concerned and for you to read your bible and check yourself, see if your being obedient to the will of God. Are you truly on the Lord side in your life, in every aspect of it or are we on the verge of making history repeat itself again? How well learnt are we from our past people? “Don’t know about you but I am terrified.” We’ve come too far to turn back now with so much knowledge and understanding of the things pertaining to God. You have to mentaly discipline your thoughts when it want to get off track on the things of the Lord.