Dear God as much as I love, praise and worship you for all blessings you’ve given me. Forever I pray to be in your grace my Heavenly Father, but I have a problem with my duty concerning humanity and my service to them. For my love they give me bitterness, my mercy and compassion a battle, when I try to forgive and let it go, they constantly remind me, for peace they are for war, love hate…a constant fight.

Truly you have to be born by immaculate conception to overcome every human emotions; grief, anger, sorrow and bitterness, etc. It is much more than one can bear. The over whelming feeling of not being able to carry out my duty for fear, doubt and hopelessness has incapacitated me. Even though Faith is the greatest factor for me to see this through, my humanity (flesh) is weak. The pain, hurt, depression and disappointment with one self to not be in control of the fear and doubt has blindsided me. I forgot who I am in you and through you. Feeling like a failure to your will because of my humanity when I’d say, “I am not Jesus, just flesh and blood what do you expect of me?”

Never given more than I can handle: The never ending sorrow continues to fill my soul with all the evil I’ve see in the world has laid a heavyweight within my spirit. I am bleeding Lord, the cut has been so severe and deep. The evil has tried to take me down, “so I stretched forth my hand to there, no other help I know.” You’ve allowed me to suffer, to be sacrificed within my spirit to bring about new growth and I’m dying, like a seed planted in the ground being broken opened to bring forth a new tree.

Matthew 7:6 “Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.” I say to this verse even though I am God fearing doesn’t mean I wouldn’t curse and cuss at people, especially the possessed, as I called them, rather than believe that peopl are so evil and wicked. I’ve been battling with this when angered and frustrated while being attacked by some. Like a dog if they try to bite and devour me I will cuss them and like a pig it they desire to drag me through the mud I’ll curse them, like Jesus did the fig tree. It’s my fleshy power of weakness I have within myself, forgive me. Who are the dogs and the pigs? The behaviors of some human beings. Many of us human do act like animals even though animal are much more intelligent than we are in their roles, instinct given by God himself to them. They are so much more in tuned to their connection with God. For humans to be compared to an animal is insulted to the animal by far, not the other way around. They are truthful to there being, and to God in their being, if you understand what I mean.

I thank you Lord for understanding who I am in my frustration and my anger. I know to value all your creations is to value love, all your love. I realized that we are afraid of the devil when in all reality, he is terrified of us because of our free will. Free will, that power given to us to even fight against you, Lord. Understanding we’re like nothing to the devil but a bug he can squish, yet Lord, your love for us has given us unprecedented powers over him if we’d just believe, have Faith and a strong relationship with you that is unwavering. When I discovered within my spirit to hate humanity is to be like the devil I wanted no part with the devil, so it changed my perspective right away. After all I am human, ” who do I think I am? And who side to I want to be on?” I chose you Lord, to make the sacrifices, stand bold and strong in Christ himself who understand what’s it’s like to be. “Thank you Lord, for hearing me. Amen and Amen!”

The fire is a form of purification and everything in the world right now is being purified. And the purification is like that of a woman in labour. We must breath then push if we intend to get through these most difficult times in the world. It feels like our emotions are at it’s peek and life is at it’s breaking point. But be faithful this to shall pass.

We must not fight against this purification, but allow Faith to carry us through. When you feel out of control, find a place you can scream and let it all out. The fire that is burning within each and everyone of us all is actually igniting things we’d rather not confront and forget. The Lord is allowing what seems like so much negativity to come to the forefront of all our live, our secrete we rather concealed. I believe the Lord is revealing to the world so we’d recognize the severity of change needed to make this world a better place, and we are all in it together. The world is created for all and as humanity we are all responsible for making it a better place for one another by our behavior.

Look at what’s happening today in our world with the pandemic, social injustice, racism and moral misconduct by a leader of what is called the free world. Humanity has to take a closer look at ourselves especially to the things that are set before us against what has been truly regarded as the will of God for us according to His Words not our interpretation of it. There’s an unrest of the spirit where truth and righteousness is it completely being battle to being over powered by evil forces.

Righteousness and truth will stand and overpower the evil forces. For this reason purification has been given. The Lord promised he’ll never destroy the earth by flood again like in the day of Noah for all mankind evil and wickedness. Yet, here we go again, doing even more unspeakable evil towards one another that is hidden, but only God sees.

But for Jesus life death and resurrection we’ve been spared from the wrath of God and given grace and mercy. A chance even in our failures to make changes and to continue to do so. As for this fact we can truly say with all humility, honor and great respect, “God is good!”

This is not for the Catholic church to decide. The church throughout history has it’s traditions and with great difficulty change is never going to be easy. Controversy and corruption has always been apart of one of the world’s largest religious institution for centuries. They are not to me, in the position to say what’s right and acceptable in the sight of God, when they themself has fallen short. The church is the first to be judged in the last days according revelation chapter 1.

My words to the Catholic church, fast and pray that the Lord will speak to you and give you the answers pertaining to His people and His will for them. “Stop answering what you believe he’d want you to say.” You can’t use sin as an excuse any more, ” let those without sin cast the first stone!” We are all sinners and we are not to turn away any sinners who wishes to come to the Lord. “Suffer not the children to come to me” Matthew 19:14. You suffer women from serving God, married couples, when majority of you have celibacy problem, hidden homosexual relations and pedophilia in your members.

This is not a judgement, but a statement of facts. We all need to search within ourselves when comes to the things pertaining to God. Through fasting and praying and not just during Lent but whenever complicated situation arises that we cannot control or fix ourselves. The Holy ghost, the other comforter, the spirit of truth will help us, it will lead us and guide us truly to the will of God even giving us discernment for certain situations.

You can’t bless same sex-marriages which you considered a sin, but yet, it’s blessed priests that are pedophiles, homosexuals and struggle with celibacy. Let’s not forget the other hidden problems the public is not informed of like alcoholism… Yes we are all humans that has our strengths and weaknesses and by no means are we perfect. We judge one another according to our expectations, what we hear, see, and our ignorance. But thank God for judging us on what he knows truthfully within our hearts and minds.

I’m just so astonished by the fact Same-sex would want to have anything to do with God. When I was growing up the ones I knew were all atheist. They hated the fact that God would create them like that in which they can’t help themselves only to be disowned by parents, rejected by your peers, especially as a teenager and made fun of. To feel alone and trapped in one self, to be told you are a sin to the point of suicide. Someone I knew killed themself because of wanting to fit in and just be like a normal person. When she came out, as they call it, she lost all her family. Imagine the lies and deception they had to live to hide their secret and the fear that came with it in being one day found out. What about the people that get hurt from the lies and deceptions who truly fall in love with them and finds out they homosexual and could never be loved by them the way they should and all they do is sneak around and lie.

Like the Gentiles, “do not call anything impure that God has made clean.” They are truth that came to light. Luke 8:17 “For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open.” Our problem is know that we know pray to God when it’s truly His call to deal with. Certain things only God can change, it’s not up to us. All we can do is pray. Amen!!!

The world is being changed for the better. The system in which it has been operating is being demolished. All powers and principalities, spiritual wickedness in high places is rampant, like the devil has been let lose in our lives. People’s mind and hearts emotionally is running so deep, it’s explosive. You can actually feel and see it, if you’re kingdom born, disciplined and well educated in such things pertaining to our Father’s business here on earth.

For years a paradigm shift has been predicted and this is it people, evolution. Every millennium humanity find ourselves in this situation, coming to the pinnacle of our existence. God doesn’t change but humanity sure does. We must change and have to each time we evolve from one level to another. It’s like being born a enfant and then grown into adulthood. The world it self plays a part in our evolution just by the never ending spinning. Take a look at what’s been going on. Everything in the dark has come to light. Nothing is hidden, the lies and truth is being revealed.

The actual enlightenment of the process of change is so much in similarity to that of labour pains as when a woman give birth. The pain becomes the enemy fighting against her, but yet it’s part of the process for the birth to be complete. We being the one change is taking place in are feeling the pain. Everything feels so out of control and crazy for now, but order will be established in due time.

I’ve been saying these same words for years now ever since I had, The Visions of Love with the Blessed Mother Mary when she asked the question, “how well learnt are We?” When I’d concentrated on the question for all of humanity I began with our position with faith, ourselves, others and all of God’s creations. My concerns about lessons we still not learning was the confusion of the many religions killing, hurting condemning and judging one another when all things are created by the One and Only God we are all fighting for the rights to earn and claim as our own. We as humanity not being able to see we can make the world a better place by resisting the devil (all sins) in our lives especially racism which started with the devil against humanity.

“It just didn’t make any sense, I thought to myself.” Why would Harry take up his wife and leave the Royal life. I wanted so much for the royal family to have a woman of colour representing. Wow! “After all it was history making.” First a black President of the United States and now a black Princess in UK. Life for black people is finally getting good and we are beginning to be treated fairly as equals. But much to my surprise, I was so crushed to learn that Harry and Meghan left their Royal duties and it didn’t make sense. It felt devastating, and disappointment; I would think, especially to all young black girls who’d dreamed of one day becoming a Princess too and to see it’s possible. And like a door slammed in your face, or your awaken from a beautiful dream, it’s over!

I am anticipating this interview Prince Harry, his wife Meghan with Oprah which air tomorrow at 8pm (cst). I couldn’t believe the backlash from the palace already against Meghan and the story has yet to be told. This is more than just racism. This is a runaway train by the palace, their traditions and blatant prejudice to outsiders. The laws must change. Haven’t these people learned anything from what happened to Princess Diana. The more the attack Prince Harry and Meghan the more the Royals popularity sinks. This can bring them down if not handle properly this time for sure. I was so hurt to hear the new allegation by the staff about Meghan. Not even knowing her personally, but for sure I knew it is a lie. They might as well had said she has stolen the borrowed Tierra she wore for her wedding and maybe a few cutlery and dishes too. They are insulting and shameful by their own actions right now, just when they had gotten the respect and admiration of the world in allowing Harry and Meghan to marry. Their marriage could of worked wonders in their favor.

I am so angry that anyone would believe for a moment that Prince Harry would allow Meghan to encourage him to leave his family the only family he’s had since the passing of his mother, like he has no back bone for himself. He’s an army officer for crying out loud and a decorated one at that, who served. He’s to me a natural born leader and trained to see danger and do whatever it takes to protect himself and others to escape it. He’s always been a free spirit. I use to hear and read of all the trouble he was getting himself into and it sounded like a cry for help or maybe he was looking for where he can fit in. One thing I’ve always realized is the palace always fixed whatever went wrong especially negative things to ruin their family published in the tabloids.

Could it be that the Palace is more upset over the fact that Prince Harry is going to have an American child? After all it is royal blood regardless. How could they have not known for a moment that Prince Harry, if he didn’t get his way when it came to protecting his family at all cost was going to leave for good. Yes, it meant that much to him, plain to see it’s has always been about what happened to his mom. Meghan loves him enough to follow his lead. I believe maybe they wanted to live in Canada, but both were better off in America after all Meghan is an American.

Things should of never gotten so bad with the Prince Harry, Meghan and the Royal Palace. It’s clear to see that even after Princess Diana death a lot of change is still yet to be taken place in the Royal Palace. Really the only thing that they got from everything Princess Diana has been through where they are concern is let everyone marry who they love? Really, that’s all! Maybe they should go back and read her Biography.

Times has change and tradition and things the way it use to be is no longer going to be, take for example with the pandemic we have no other choice but to make changes in our lives that necessary. William and Harry both are the changes needed for the monarchy to press on into the future and make it better than before by doing something different like their mother did. She was preparing them for such a time as now. I can only pray they know truly who they are and what’s really is their purpose. I believe it is to use their status to make positive changes in their lives all surrounding them and in the world.

As I sit here writing, I couldn’t help but think to myself, the importance for all blacks to know the history of our people, from being enslaved, fighting for our rights like if being a different skin color made you not a human being, to be treated like an animal or even worst. It’s sad, because there are animals treated better than some black people have ever been treated, even today. Whenever I think of the suffering of black people I think of the four hundred years of the Israelites in Egypt enslaved by Pharaoh who refused to have let them go. But yet Pharaoh was afraid that they would one day take them over, because there was too many of them. God send Moses to deliver them out of their bondage.

Black History Month is vital to our exixtence it teaches blacks can do great things and be more than just slaves. We are capable of making the world a better place. When given the chance we can excel into greatness and accomplish so much.

We’ve come a long way and still the victory to be won for equality is a continuous battle. It hurts me to know after all blacks has been through, stolen from their country brought to foreign lands and enslaved. Their are some whites, especially old timers who believes to themselves, blacks are so privilege today what more do we want? What’s this, “Black Lives Matter!” Some whites even want for things to go back the way it was when they ruled, and abused blacks, who had no rights. They’d wish blacks to stay in their place of submissions to their authority and control like the good old days. I heard them speaking when they thought I wasn’t listening and I’ve even seen the looks in some of their eyes towards a black person especially the black men, it’s very hurtful. As a black woman, I strongly believe we are not the threat, but our fathers, brothers, husbands and sons are for some reason.

I could never forget this, it was in elementary school the first time I was called the N-word by a classmate and told to go back to Africa which is not where I was born. I could remember it, like it was yesterday, that hurt I felt already feeling isolated being one of the only black child in my class and afraid of being in a new school surrounded by so many strangers and them being all white. I suck it up and said nothing, because I was petrified and intimated. First year in high school, history class, studying ancient humans when one of my classmates after our teacher had given a description of the first humans looking like Apes, Neanderthal man, he turned looked at me and said, “look they are describing what you look like” and the entire class broke out in laughter. This time I didn’t felt intimidated or petrified, my respond was, “why then are you here on my earth if I was here first, no wonder you white people hate us.” There was a silence that you could of heard a pin dropped. The teacher said nothing, but carried on with his teaching after the brief moment of silence like nothing happened. He didn’t intervene to what the classmate had said nor my response. From then on I realized it was all ignorance that people are prejudice because of lack of wisdom, knowledge and understanding. But those two experiences prepped me for the reality I was going to face in the world as an adult because of the color of my skin. It hurt me deeply within my soul and affected me mental because of my innocence being a child, believing that the color of my skin shouldn’t matter, I was same age as everyone in my class. My first experience with racism and back then and I didn’t even understand that it was racism. You’re not prepared for that, especially if it’s not something you hear about or ever discuss at home.

I have no hate or dislike to any other people of different colors, even if they themselves would have a problem with me. I believe God created all humanity like a bouquet of flowers the beauty of it is in the difference types and the earth is our vase. There’s room for us all and it is our difference in color that makes us stand out equally not above or bellow. It is not the same for each person characteristics or personality. When come to the color of someone’s skin it’s like when it is said, ” Don’t judge the book by its cover.” There are just good and bad people no matter their color or whatever. No one human being is perfect except Jesus who wasn’t even fully human.

There’s so much more I’d like to write about, but I want to end this nice and short. Growing up I was blessed to have two white best friends one was German and the other French Canadian my sisters. We saw each other as people not black or white, but family, thank the Lord! And my husband whom I am married to for over twenty-five years also white for the first time in his life learned the hard reality by marrying a black person teaches you as a white person the existence of racism, especially with sons, it’s for real and it’s brutal. Will continue this topic next Black History Month. God bless!!!

Music was once my aspiration. I was going be a famous singer like Diana Ross from the singing group, The Supreme and Donna Summer the Disco Queen. Even though they were black women their voices was not like that of typical black women from back in those days. Accused of wanting to be more white women than black as I remembered was the controversy about these two singers. To me they are beatiful women, I admired and looked up to them as professionals and gifted at what they do, which to me was amazing and brilliant. They not only made history with their talents, but paved a way for the generations of other black women. As it is called today, they are game changers. They redefined typical black women in the music entertainment industry. I love these women and had spend most of my childhood and adolescence wanting to immulate everything about them as singers.

Oprah Winfrey, talk show host, television producer, actress, author, and philanthropist. Also a history maker, North America first black mulit-billionaire, and ranked the greatest black philanthropist in American history. Oprah being authentic herself, as I watched and listen to her, a black woman who broke down barriers where it had at one time seems to be impossible for anyone black to accomplish. I admire and love her for being God gift to us. She is beautiful inside and out; educated, intelligent, spiritual…

Michelle Obama, the first black woman to be the First Lady of America to be the queen of The White House. What a position held, and she did it with such class and dignity. Beside every good man is a strong, intelligent and amazing woman. To me  she was created by God for her role to stand with her President  husband. A wife and mother, also mother to the nation, she took on her responsibilities. She made me proud to be a black woman because she represented us all with such excellence.

Mrs Serita Jakes, wife, mother, author, speaker and visionary, executive director of women’s and children’s affairs at The Potter’s House. Mrs. Jakes, wife of Bishop Tdjakes, what a position she holds. This is a big lifetime commitment to God and her husband, in which she does so well. “To whom much is given, much is required” according to scriptures and she shows by standing besides her husband to be the First Lady of a Mega Church she’s got what it takes. When you’re a faithful person in God, you know that there are natural and spiritual battles you encounter in your walk and you’ve got to be able to put on the Armor of God not just to protect yourself, husband and children, but also your spiritual children of all race. You have a responsibility that keeps you on your knees in prayer and she is ever so faithful. It’s plain to see she is always there to support and comfort. She’s to be lifted up in prayer, and honoured for such a call by the Lord on her life that she does with grace and love. She’s the perfect example like Mother Mary to say to give God consent, “Let it be unto me according to thy word.”

There’s so many influential black women in the world that makes me proud, but I can only mention a few. I thank God for everyone of them.

John 15:19 If you were of the world, the world would love his own: but because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.

People we must get it through our heads, there are bad people in the world that has done some real evil things and shows no remorse for it. We’ve got to be discerning. We must not confuse bad for good. Pray for the spirit of truth to reveal if someone is being hated for being chosen by God and not just because of jealousy and envy, wicked and evil deeds, religion, race, sexual orientation, gender, social status, the way you look, dress…and the list goes on. Lord have mercy on humanity.

The character of a person says a lot about them. Read your Bible, see if anything about a persons characteristic you’ve chosen to look upon as a servant of God is like that of Jesus. Remember the devil is not only a tempter, but a liar and a deceiver. Anything that is written in the word of God he mocks, by using it to do evil deeds, by deceiving especially the faithful. But God is not going to let it go on.

From today on the salvation of the Lord is at hand in the earth for all his chosen. He’s calling them from blindness into revelation sight. Are you blind ?

Well I believed once upon a time I could of play both sides. And I saw it as keeping the peace and whatever it takes to get the job done. But when you are called by the Lord to be on his side, to keep peace and attain whatever he desires of you, you must sacrifice. Without sacrifice there’s no gain. It is fear that motivates us to play both sides. But it takes faith in God to allow us to get the victory and to accomplish whatever is desired.

It’s a lie we tell ourselves when we try dancing with the devil and then singing in God’s choir of worship. Be truthful to God and ourselve, because the only way is God’s. Jesus says to take up our cross and follow him, and don’t try to save our life, Matthew 16:24-26. He didn’t say be him, in which we can never be. If it requires sacrifice of ourselves to be left out in the cold by the world, then so be it. Scriptures declares, “what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?

Pick a side! There’s no middle when comes to the Lord’s business. You’re either on the Lord’s our the world’s. The kingdom of the Lord has come and it is within us all who was set aside for God’s purpose.

As I’ve sat and watched the 2nd impeachment of former President Trump, I couldn’t help but wonder if the result would of been the same if it was President Barack Obama in that position. I don’t want to make it out to be like I am making this a racial issue, but let us be truthful when looking deeply within our hearts and minds with all honesty. A brother with an inferiority complex feels like he would of been crucified if it was him and a white man if racist would feel entitled to want to crucify the black man for his actions. Why? Because he’d believes it confirms, blacks are beneath the expectations of humanity in his being, as he having a superiority complex. “Lord have mercy on us all!”

I cried out to God simply because I wanted truth and righteousness to prevail. I wanted a guilty verdict according to the evidences. I want for when I am trying to teach and convince people doing right and speaking truth, God would be on our side and we shall be victorious over the enemy. I cried, ” God how could you let this happen, when the evidence proved other wise!” I almost fell from grace when I thought then the truth does really set us free. “The devil is a liar, because it was not God’s judgement but man’s.” God’s judgements is seen heard and felt by the world. God’s truth and righteousness opens blind eyes to see and brings us out of darkness. This was all a cover up and a lie by the enemy. But when the spirit of truth reveals himself, the Holy Ghost comes forth, this I know he’ll bring down all the lie.

An impeachment acquital with evidence of undoubtedly guilt. I couldn’t help but think about Bill Crosby, a black man history maker and I cried. His judgement, guilty or not, I can’t throw a stone, for I am not without sin, I believe belongs to God not me, I saw no evidences. It is Black History Month and he’s not mentioned and I wept sadly. Why? Because in man’s judgements they said crucify him for his past, in which he change around for the good. When he was a child he did as a child, but when he became a man he had put away childish things. But, yet he has been stripped from the crown of his head to the sole of his feet and nailed to the cross. He being like the thief that was crucified beside Jesus on the cross at Calvary (Luke 23:39-43) who’d asked to be with him when he gets to paradise and Jesus said, surely he’ll be. In other words he paid his price for his sins, he’s on the cross. I don’t think anyone who had nailed him to the cross remember the ultimate price he paid was the lost of his only son. I pray God deliver him and he’s given a pardon to live out his days so he can continue to do good in the world and make a difference. He can become from a Saul to a Paul in the sight of God, not man. Jeremiah 17:10 “I the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, even to give to each man according to his ways, according to the results of his of his deeds. Lord hear my prayer!

I believe we should forgive each other for the sins we’ve committed and show mercy, as we’ll also want mercy to be shown unto us. Know that whatever you do for others you do also for yourself as well, for the will of God and to him (Matthew 25:40 “whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” Pray to God for deliverance of deliberate sinners, the bible calls presumptuous. There’s nothing you can do for them other than putting them in the hands of God, by prayer and faith, especially when they’ve done something so unforgivable.

There’s no discrmination when our conduct as human beings not a race, wrong is just wrong we do, “it is called sin people, and it’s within us all, we are born into it.” We all sin and fall short, it’s human nature, stop throwing stones at race.