When all has failed you, who else can you turn to but God? Matthew 8:24 The disciples were afraid that they were going to die in a storm while Jesus was in the boat sleeping. But look how lucky they were to have had direct access to Jesus to wake him up by crying out, and right away he calmed the storm by rebuking it. Wait a minute when Jesus awoke instead of being panicked and troubled the first thing he said was, “why are you fearful, oh you of little faith.” What an example of faith!

The fear was real and even though the disciples knew Jesus was capable of performing great miracles. Jesus was tempted for forty days by the devil after he was baptized by John. Matthew 3:13-17, 4:1-11 But what has caused the target on Jesus by the devil was Matthew 3:16-17 As soon as Jesus was baptized,  he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the spirit of God descending like a dove and a lighting on him and a voice from heaven said,”This is my son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” The devil has always been after Jesus in one way or the other all his life, but I believe God’s declaration of Jesus was the key to the devil demise for all to hear. You see Jesus over came the devil in the wilderness so now he came after the disciples to get to Jesus.

What really is the storm in our lives? It is the struggles within and around us we refuse to rebuke like Jesus did in Mark 4:39 And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, “Peace be still,” and the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. Jesus says we can do this by faith. But yet we say it’s hard to trust God in a storm. Many times we find ourselves in a storm and like the disciples Jesus is right there in it with us, even when the fear is real, when we can’t rebuke the storm do like the disciples wake up Jesus by praying and meditating in the word; having great faith. But what Jesus really taught us is to be still and know that God is God, to stand in faith with bold assurance Psalm 46:1-11 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth be removed, and the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea, though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof…

Only when you’re in the storm you can truly feel the fear and anxiety it causes. Remember nothing last for ever after the rain the sun will shine again, so this too will pass God is always in control, have faith.

Peter was among the first of the disciples called during Jesus’ ministry. He became the first apostle ordained by Jesus and he worked as a fisherman in Bethsaida. He was named Simon, Barjona. He was a trong-willed, impulsive and used bad words. Peter met Jesus through his brother Andrew, who followed Jesus after John proclaimed him to be the Lamb of God. Jesus named Simon, Cephas which in Aramaic means Peter, which is Greek for the rock.

Peter left everything behind to follow Jesus, even his marriage and his job as a fisherman. He was one of the first to confess Jesus was the Christ. A natural leader, despite all of his imperfections and having several failings in his life, he was the spokesman for all the disciples.

He was part of the inner circle of Christ; being one of the only three that Jesus reveals all his secrets to and was up close and personal with him. Peter saw Jesus perform all kind of miracles and unbelievable things, like raising Jairus’ daughter from  death (Mark 5:35-42), witnessing Jesus’ transfiguration(Matthew1:1-2) etc.

Peter was impulsive; when he saw Jesus walking on the water, he left the security of the boat to walk on the water to meet Jesus and fell in. He rebuked Jesus for speaking of his death and boasted that he would never deny Jesus, which he did three times. He also wanted to build a church on the mount of transfiguration to honor Moses and Elijah. It is said that he was the one who drew the sword in the garden of Gethsamane and cut off the ear of the soldier of the High Priest. Matthew14:28-28, 16:22, 17:4, 26:33 John18:10

After Peter had showed himself to be impulsive, imperfect and having denied Jesus, he was ashamed. The resurrected Jesus called for him(Mark 16:7) to hear the good news. He restored Peters’ brokenness(John 21:6-15-17) and ordained him. On the day of Pentecost, Peter was once again the leader of the disciples and he spoke to the crowd (Acts2:14) Peter began his work with bold assurance. He healed and preached; the frustration, fear and anger no longer had a hold on him. Being arrested, beaten and threatened didn’t stop him from doing the will of God.

Peter, through, Christ opened the church to all people not just to the Jews, but the Gentiles also (Acts 10). At first, he resisted when God spoke to him on the roof top concerning Cornelius the Gentile. Peter was the first to conclude that God doesn’t show favoritism. I was moved in my spirit by the fact that it took a single touch from the Divine to make an imperfect and impulsive man that was filled with so much anger change his attitude. On the rooftop, this time Peters’ impulsiveness didn’t control him and he did the will of God.

By many standards, Peter would not be suited for the Kingdom. But Jesus saw what was not visible to man in Peter, a vessel for God that, once filled, will no long have a hollow sound. Peter, I understand why you were a curser and a fighter, called impulsive and imperfect and having many failures in your life. You had what it took to be a leader and a warrior, but it took Jesus’ life and death to train and tame you for your kingdom position. When we proclaim to be a vessel of God we must have the right heart and mind, which Peter did. Peter was passionate and committed. Peter sincerely meant what he said and did with good intentions.

Mark 14:27 Jesus said to his disciples, “all you shall be offended because of me this night, for it is written, I will smite the shepherd, and the sheep shall be scattered.” When Peter who just saw Jesus taken away, I understand it to be his anger and frustration that made him deny Christ. Here is Peter, the only one of the disciples to reveal that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the Living God, the Messiah, who saw all the miracles and unbelievable things Jesus was capable of doing from in his inner circle and was being exposed to his secrets as well. What do you do when the one you look up to like a hero allows himself to be taken away without a fight knowing his abilities and struggling to figure out why wouldn’t he do something, anything to stop it? Jesus called Peter Satan for pleading with him not to go to Jerusalem and be killed, when he walked on the water and fell into it because he was afraid, told him he had little faith, and then rebuked him for cutting the ear off the soldiers when trying to defend, and protect him. Jesus had shown Peter his power and might and yet in the time of his need did nothing. All the other disciples ran away because of fear. Peter was fearful also, “yes” because he couldn’t understand why Jesus wasn’t fighting back or even doing something to break free. I believe he was thinking to himself does Jesus know that they are all in it together? Whatever is happening to him is going to affect those who are with him, who love and care for him.

The lesson I believe Jesus wanted Peter to learn is to know when to use his power and what to use it for, because Jesus used his to help others not himself, “humility.” Matthew 16:24 Jesus said, “anyone who wants to follow me has to deny himself, and take up his cross and follow me.”

Some people can only be strong when they know that they are not alone in the battle. Unity is strength and power especially having great support with you, like Jesus. But he had to stand alone. Jesus was the strength of the disciples, he was the pillar, rock, and foundation. When Jesus was taken away everyone that followed him crumbled, even someone like Peter the great warrior.

 

I was once ignorant myself to the Ministries today that seem to be very wealthy and still believe that there are some churches that are selling God for profit. But I do believe that they will be exposed for their wrongs sooner or later. Scriptures tell us not to take the name of the Lord our God in vain and that God is not to be mocked, so when we say God or call on Him we better be doing it in spirit and truth, because woah unto whom so ever does it you shall be exposed.

I’ve come to the knowledge of this because of a Bishop to whom I love and respect and trust very much now. It took nine years yes, but I can say with bold assurance cause I’ve tested and tried everything about this man in the spirit by fasting and praying to God. I know without a doubt he is the real deal a loving, compassionate, honest, kind hearted, merciful; a true man of God and is surrounded by people just like himself. I don’t know him personally, but I am connect to him spiritually. And he is the second man in the world I’ve ever been connected to in such a way, I see beyond the man but his soul and spirit.

I’ve always asked for the spirit of discernment and truth, because my heart has lead me in some bad situations especially when it came to trusting people. I was always led down the wrong path by people, my innocence tested. So I put on the wisdom of discernment and truth and walk in faith trusting no one but God himself asking the right questions like  is it wrong to be a Christian and rich? I waited for the right responses. I was led by the Holy spirit to search the scriptures. 1Timothy 6:1-10, 17-18 Teaches about false teaching and true riches. We  must all agree to the teaching of Jesus Christ and not be swollen up with pride and yet know nothing, having an unhealthy desire to argue and quarrel about words that bring on jealousy, disputes, insults, evil suspicions, and constant arguments from people whose minds are corrupt, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain. Godliness with contentment is great gain. We brought nothing into the world and we can take nothing out of it. If we have food and clothing, we should be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will store up for themselves a treasure which will be a solid foundation for the future. And then they will be able to win the life which is true life. Matthew 6:24 No one can be a slave of two masters; he will hate one and love the other; he will be loyal to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. Matthew 6:33 Seek you first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you. What things you ask? To first understand this phrases you have to read Matthew 6:25-33 Jesus said, don’t worry about your life, what you should eat, drink or wear God would provide for you just as he does the birds, flowers and grass. 1King 3:13God said to Solomon, “I will give you what you have not asked for-both wealth and honor so that in your lifetime you will have no equal among kings.” God had given Solomon because he didn’t ask for wealth, honor, revenge on his enemies or long life, he asked for a wise and discerning heart. God blessed Solomon.

For all the people who are complaining about the wealthy ministries in todays world, have to read your bible and gotten educated about the true wealth, which is the wealth given by God? Proverb 10:22 The blessing of the Lord brings wealth, without painful toil for it. Psalm 112: 1-3 Blessed are those who fear the Lord, who find great delight in his commands. Their children will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. Wealth and riches are in their house, and their righteousness endures. forever. Anything that God doesn’t bless doesn’t prosper, especially using him for evil gain. No matter how long it seems to last it would be  exposed for what it is all about and be destroyed. God cannot be mocked neither his name be taken in vain.

Luke 12:15 Watch out and guard yourselves from every kind of greed, because a person’s true life is not made up of the things he owns, no matter how rich he may be, Jesus said. Psalm 62:10 If riches increase set not your heart upon them.

I do believe that if anyone has wealth yet has no love according to scripture you have nothing. What profit a man that he gains the whole world and loses his soul? Those who are on the Lord side there light will shine and shine in the righteousness of God himself and those who are not shall be destroyed in one way or the other.

Many are called but few are chosen scripture says(Matthew 22:14) I believe I  was chosen because like the majority of all the main characters of the Bible I had a real life experience with God, just like Moses, I needed real proof and I got it.

1Peter 4:11 If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth, that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. Amen KJV

Some people go through troubles before they know God. Well I went through it for being in His presence because I was born knowing Him. I was never lost or confused about if He was or was not, I just knew He is, but it was amplified when I stood in His presence and His light affected me all over that like Moses and I began to shine. But when I realized that I was in the world and not of the world, everything changed. I started praying every three hours, fasting and prophesying. I was like a Daniel and I also had dreams and visions. I saw things and knew thing. Today as it stands everything I knew and saw decades ago and prophesy has and is every day coming to pass. I had abilities beyond normal human abilities and the first was to discern true men and women of God and the churches.

I believed for the longest time that it was my disobedience that got me in many  afflictions in my life which could have been avoided and boy was I ever afflicted. Everything that I loved and cared about was touched and I blamed myself to the point of me getting emotional and physically sick  which lead to my understanding of  Mental illness where I found myself as one that said, “it could never happen to me, but did.” Fear also became one of the driving forces behind what I believe to have been my disobedience as well as powers and principalities that I was fighting. It took me uprooting my family and moving to another province or state as called to realize that I had nothing to do with me not proceeding in my calling, it was God who pulled me out from where I was which was not good for me and when I came to the understanding to stop blaming myself and to trust he is in control and has been, of my life. I couldn’t go back to the old ways but here’s what I should do to still do what I was doing before, just practice until I am where he wants me to be in my strength to fight. I had to be still and silent until he saw it fit and ready for me to come forth again in his strength.

And while I was waiting, I was watching and praying and I would look at what I call, with no disrespect, textbook reader floaters, which to me means book sense but no spiritual sense talking about a God they never encountered, had a relationship with but is just reading and being taught on how to minister. I was told when you’re spiritually taught then you’re well taught. Today being in ministry is a billion dollar business, it’s a way to carry it on to the next generations so everyone is beginning to see it as a money making institution. It stirred my spirit because I couldn’t understand that just by them reading and being taught is enough for them to believe. It would take a miracle or troubles in their life for them to have faith, I thought to myself, what if they knew what I knew and saw what I saw, heard what I heard and felt what I felt and had dreams and visions and then put it together with the word of God? What would they do with that knowledge? I know it seems like I am being judgemental, but I was just asking a question and being argumentative to God for making it seem so easy for others yet it must be so hard on me and I would hear, “to whom much is given much is required” I don’t want to hear that, I want to be like every body. Because I dive in deep, and I mean so deep, where the Holy ghost is the oxygen needed to breath and function. When I am ready to fly with the knowledge received once again it is the Holy ghost that carries me to the highest heights. I was always looking to find someone like me, who is led only by the Holy ghost, and told you have no other choice.

Decades of fasting and praying opened the door to a spiritual connection to God that any questions I asked of God, He always answers me, and I mean always. To call my blog site Oracle of Divinity describe my intermittent relationship and connection with the almighty in all humility as my eyes have opened to see and my ears to hear, my mouth to speak and my lame feet that began to walk in his path of insight to all his truth and righteousness not as I see, but as He allows me to, and it is powerful sometimes even too much. People, we really don’t want to hear the truth, because it would disrupt everything we thought in our minds, and seen as well as believed to be our truth. The only way to describe it is to die and come back and try to tell others what took place when you died.

 

 

 

I don’t have time to argue and fight over what religion is right or wrong. I’ve been seeking through the understanding of all religions and I realized it took a long time for me to get to where I am in  my faith after become one with them, can you say the same for yourself?

In my search, or should I say understanding, I learned that no matter what religion or form of practice of faith, we are all searching for the one thing, “proof and truth of the living God, higher power or whatever we want to call it.” And we all believe that our faith is the right one. I believe it is all true, because it is your faith that makes it true Matthew 17:20 If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, “move from here to there and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” So if I want to believe in a statue, pendent, beads, mountain top, building, a book or whatever by may faith, I make it true.

It had all began with the relationship between Adam and God until temptation entered by the devil when Eve and Adam ate the forbidden fruit in the garden of Eden, we had then known who the one and true God was to us. After we were lost, torn apart from God and confused because of our disobedience to the word of our father who said,not to eat of the tree of good and evil for we shall truly die(Genesis 2:17). From then on everything went down hill for all of humanity in our connection, our relationship, even to our knowledge of God has far been removed, just like it is for some of us today. So we had no other choice but to search for him without wisdom, knowledge  or understanding in every aspect of our lives. We started out with all the other Gods after the fall of Adam and Eve, but eventually coming to the knowledge of the one and true God through the life, death and resurrection of Jesus.

I believe it to be all part of God’s plan to allow so many faiths to exist and at each level you climb in the wisdom, knowledge and understanding of him whom you seek as I have by practicing other faiths, to reaching such a high level of understanding that it is God, not the devil or man who he himself has created, that we are seeking and calling out to. God is a creator of diversity and difference; and he can find beauty in it all even in bad which only he himself can understand, he didn’t make all look the same, speak the same language, think the same and all other things we do. It is for us to understand this, that is why we shouldn’t have eaten the fruit of the knowledge of good and evil in which was too much for us to handle. Think of it this way  babies shouldn’t be eating grown-up foods only milk because their stomachs can’t digest it and they have no teeth.

Don’t be fooled God can understand everything even to all languages and faiths, to all the ignorant people out there who believe he only understands theirs. So no need to fight and argue among ourselves regarding who is right because he is in control and will bring all of us together. It is just a matter of time and the whole truth nothing but the truth will be revealed.

 

Being born Christian, I am saying being born because I have always known that I was. I always tried to live my life according to the things taught in the church and written in the Bible. I wanted so much to live a Christian life and tried so hard, but it seemed to have all been in vain. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t seem to get it right any and everything went wrong. I always felt like the Psalm 51:5 of David, “Behold, I was shaped in iniquity and in sin did my mother conceive me. I love God and I want to go to heaven when I die. It has always been in my spirit to fight to live righteously according to the word of God. My greatest fear was sinning, and knowingly doing so.

I never wanted to confront the devil or ever be in his path. It has always been a fear of mine, but yet, he found a way to get to me through out my entire life. Many times I’ve wondered when did it all start and why? I believe myself to be a good, caring and loving person. I would never intentionally hurt some. I truly believe in do unto others as you’d like them to do unto you and follow the way of Jesus.

I have a wonderful relationship with God. I do believe, he has been my imaginary friend all my life. And like any relationship, we have little arguments. I know I am a work in progress so I make mistakes, but because I know he is omnipotent, omnipresent and omniscient, creator of everything our God, my question to God has  always been, “why, why would he allow bad things to happen, and why would he have even created good and evil, why?” I wish that evil never exist. That Adam and Eve had never eaten the apple.

The eleventh of December 2016 I had a dream I was face to face with Satan(the devil) and for some reason I knew it was him right away. I called him by his name Lucifer morning star also know as little horn. He then answered me when I called him by his name and much to my amazement he is an angel that looked like a beaming light with features and his facial appearance is like that of Santa Clause, beard and everything. I always thought the he would look more like a monster, but he didn’t. Right away he said to me, ” a monstrous thing never comes looking like a monster to scare you away, when trying to draw you near. God created beauty and ugly; blessed are you when you have them both. He told me that no longer can he possess us, unless we invite him in and allow him, that it is written in scriptures, “resist the devil and he will flee from you” James 4:7. Never for a moment believe that the life of Jesus, his birth, death and resurrection didn’t change anything. He said, ” I along with you who had sinned against God we’re the prodigal son, just remember my conversation with God in the book of Job when I went into Gods presence with the other angels (Job 1:6-12) where I ask God to torment Job and his family to see if he would curse God. That this story belongs to all God’s chosen people not just Job and his family even to this generation.” He still wants to know how much we have faith and trust in God if he torments us. He understands who God truly is, but we don’t. Even though God in our understanding is omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent, he is still trying to process who we are. Arrogance came from Satan most definitely. He was so proud to tell me he is an spiritual being like all the other angels, was once a light and now has been dimmed, he can still shine, only through our temptations, weakness. doubt and fears that leads us to sin.

He spoke about us giving him too much credit for all the evil in the world, when we are the ones who have a problem dealing with the knowledge of good and evil. We are the ones who must now after Jesus presence be able to conquer what was planted in us in the garden of Eden. He did proclaimed that the hour of Jesus’s death when the earth had quaked was when the battle between him and Jesus had began until his resurrection as we should understand Jesus won the battle, but the war had just begun. Not with him, but what had been let go on man through temptation which is causing the war. It is us human beings who need to go through what we must because without afflictions in our lives we are never happy, neither would we know to draw nearer to God as some of us do in the midst of adversities, and we would be bored.

He claims to be rectified with God and is changed, but humanity is forever changing like the season. He calls himself thunder for that is his purpose and we are lightening. Together the two things that changed the course of God’s creation, God has pulled us together for a reason to make us together like him, we are Gods.

He stated what seem to be prophetic Peace and tranquility belongs for Heaven and in Heaven. Peace and tranquility is for those who believes in Jesus Christ it is extended to you from Heaven through Christ.

After speaking to me so nicely he turned into that thing that I had expected him to be in the first place, a monster. My attitude was to fight him I didn’t care how nice he pretended to be and looked I was expecting this. He’d looked like the monster Michael Jackson turned into in his video Ghost and said, “are you scared yet?” I didn’t waver I wanted to fight him so badly. All I visualized in my mind was Jesus and him fighting like two brothers going at it physically with each other and there entered into my hand a flaming sword and he vanished, I was not about to back down. Then the dream changed.

It was like being on a train everything was moving on the outside very fast like traveling in a train. On the train I saw a pot on a stove, I went to take the pot off the stove and like a magnet something pulled it to the floor and I could not get it back up on the stove. When I looked up from trying to pull the pot back on the stove to see if anyone was around and was seeing what was going on. I saw a woman, little girl, boy and a man just appearing out of nowhere like if I am not on a train anymore and this is happening like a movie playing right in front of me as I am trying to pull this pot from being stuck to the floor. The woman took a boy child kissed and left the little girl as she hurried off somewhere. As for the man I had no idea what became of him. I saw this lady that came out of nowhere, who told me she was waiting for them to ring the door open so we can get in the light. What door I thought to myself still believing I was on the train, but the light turned on then I woke up out the dream.

My husband told me all night I was talking and fighting in my dreams. It was five twenty am in the morning as I awoke and wrote this. Before I could get out of bed I started praying like I never prayed before.

I could never understood why all this time I spend being afraid and scared of the devil. This has been a sword in my spirit causing me not go forward in my life to what GOD has called me to be, my purpose and destiny was compromised by my fears. I never understood why all this time I was so afraid all the time of the devil, which is the thing that supposed to have devastated me the most with his temptations to lead me down the wrong path, with anything that he’d used to get to me. I felt for the first time in my life I was going to fight back with all my might even to my dying last breath, tired of being afraid and terrified by everything.

“Why did the devil come to me? I kept asking myself.” I believe it’s because I told God I was fed up of this life and I don’t know why he keeps bring me back from the dead when I feel like I am serving no purpose at least that’s what it felts like to me. I knew certain things I’ve asked God for he’s always granted it to me, even some he didn’t. I consider myself to be blessed and contended to the point that even though money is a problem when not in abundance to do all the things  I’d want to God always hears and answers my prayers. Whenever  I go into deep meditation and retreat myself from the world, God gives me knowledgeable answers in dreams and visions. I never had to ask God if there was a devil because I knew we as human beings were battling something we don’t understand because why does bad things keep happening even when you are good?

The devil was the last puzzle to the creation story. He was also created for a purpose. I had to confront the greatest mystery of God’s creation the wisdom of knowledge of good and evil. I knew I believed in God but the devil, no. To find out that he also is a spirit and can fool us if we’re not careful and discerning was scary. I couldn’t confront everything in my life if I wasn’t willing to confront my greatest fears, to be an overcomer in Christ’s army I confronted everything else that was good and righteous that was easy for me to except and hold fast to, but evil I’d refused to have any path with whatsoever, not realizing it is the balance in this life. Trying to be perfect and righteous in this world is not possible at all without God wanting it so.

This world is ruled by the odds and I am even. To me, if you are odd you fit right in the world, but being even condemns you to being perfect and truthful in a world that’s not. You have to be odd; top heavy bottom light or opposite. We can only strive to be even.

I was so angry at God, I believe that Satan showed up for me. It seems like his plans were to recruit me for all my backsliding. I was angry enough to believe that being good isn’t worth it anymore fed up of the wickedness in the world and hated and distrust my fellow man, but he was only there to put me right in a sense with understanding of evil in the world and not to blame God.

 

 

I get it: God is the shield and protector of hearts. Once your heart is extended with pureness and unconditional love. He will mend it when it is broken.

I was afraid to love again. Love is like a fire that burns and once you know fire burns, why would you allow yourself to be burnt again? Wouldn’t you be cautious or do you not have feelings? This kind of burn can only be healed by God and can leave no scars.

God is love and His love gives us the strength to keep on loving despite the pain and hurt we may go through.  When we’re baptised in Christ we become one with Him(Galatians 3:27). Christ is in us, in those who believes in Him. If the battle is not ours so much is the hurt, discouragement and fear for the sake of righteousness. I believe that God takes it all for us because of Jesus our advocate and mediator.

God can change our mind, thoughts and our heart. We have to have the willingness to allow Him into our lives.

The prayer.

Lord help us to know that you are our shield in times of battle. Our shelter in times of a storm. You’re the light in our darkness, comforter in our distress. We trust in you to never be let down.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to know in your heart you don’t like what God is taking you through and to be like Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26:39) Thy will be done Lord. It take a lot of strength in faith. Thank you Jesus for the garden of Gethsemane for if you didn’t enter your wouldn’t of understood my pains, sorrows and fears, that you could tell me, “be still and know that you are God and the battle is not mine.

Sometimes it may seems like you’re running on empty because virtue has left your spirit. But God always pours more into you at the right moment.

God is whole not a piece or a half. His power is in the physical and spiritual healing of our soul. That kind of touch is what makes us run around the churches and act like we’re crazy.

Whatever conflicts you are battling in life as a Christian, just remember not to be hard on yourself, you are a work in progress, God knows! When your flesh is weary it is the spirit of God in you that carries you through.

To all that read my blog, I am so sorry for not blogging as much as I should. I wait all the time for my daughter to edit my blogs and sometimes she’s so busy doing her own thing which I don’t blame her and I do appreciate with all of my heart when she does take time out of her life busy schedule to read my blogs and edit it for me. For the first time she was adamant and refused. She said, ” I am pretty sure mom I taught you everything you need to know, how to advertise, to even post your blog, so why aren’t you?” Like a child I replied, I just can’t remember how to copy and paste which is the truth.” She did, she taught me how to do this so long ago when I first learned to blog and was still afraid of using the computer. Whenever something would go wrong or pop up while I am using the computer I’d panic cause I wouldn’t know what to do, but I am learning and still a work in progress.

I said to my daughter it is ok if she didn’t want to edit my blog, I kind of understood her frustration with me. I’ve learned this saying, “don’t just give someone fish all the time, teach them how to fish for themselves.” After thirty something years of being a mother I had to learn this for my grown children and stop babying them. So what she said made me  realized I had to, like how I am trying to teach them be independent of me. I don’t believe myself to be intelligent enough to be a writer. My punctuation and grammar is so terrible. I didn’t like school and English was not my favorite subject simply because I suck at it, even it being my mother tongue. I speak with an accent and I write just how I speak according to my grade nine teacher. All of my life going to school suffering and not knowing I had dyslexia that’s why learning was so difficult for me. I found out only when my first born, like me, was having the same learning disabilities as I did in school and was tested. Instead of being beaten for not learning back in my days I wished they had known about dyslexia. I couldn’t read music, I hated math class and didn’t like reading and comprehension cause I’d read but never could understand and to this day don’t like reading much except for the bible.

My greatest fear is that I am not good enough or capable. When it comes to my writing I am not confident at all, but with someone besides me to read it over and edit it gives me reassurance and confidence. My problem is confidence and the lacking there of. I do know I’ve got to step up and be of good courage as Psalm 27:14 and the Lord will strengthen me. Philippians 4:13 I could do all things through Christ which strengthens me. I know that God will always except whatever we try and do for the greater glory of him, but man they are never satisfied and I just would like to punch them in the nose for their ignorance. I worry too much about every little thing. I know I could do it just got to stop being so afraid and lack self confidence.

 

 

Couldn’t help it, the thought just popped into my head as I was reflecting on the Exodus story. I realized that God didn’t send Moses back to Egypt to face his demons, but God send Moses to deliver his people out of bondage, like the bondage he was in concerning his true identity being a Hebrew but yet brought up an Egyptian. When Moses was grown up and found out he was Hebrew, in Exodus 2:11-15 he went out unto his people and saw their burdens and there was an Egyptian who was beating one of them and Moses killed him. He then had to fled from the face of Pharaoh, who sought to kill him. He questioned if there was God, why wasn’t God getting them out of their bondage. If he only knew God was waiting on him to come into his presence and acknowledge him; his purpose for being drawn out of the water and brought up in the palace by the Pharaoh’s sister as an Egyptian, was to wait patiently for Moses to come into the knowledge of who he is, not an Egyptian, but a Hebrew to deliver his people from their bondage. God did hear the cry of the people and of Moses regarding how he felt about Hebrews situation. Moses was like a single man and looking for a spouse to have a relationship with and  share their life with until they found God. They came together to care for these unruly children which they both love and cared about. These children are the reason for them coming together in the first place.

First Moses was like I don’t think I could do this, I don’t have what it takes to be a good parent I have issues but then God was like I am going to stand all the way with you through this, you’re not going to be alone we are going to do this together (Exodus 3 and 4). Now Moses left the children with the babysitter Aaron whiles up in the mount getting instructions from God on the next step in parenting. They felt he was taking to long, or maybe he had left them, when God told Moses to get down from the mount, for the people have corrupted themselves (God’s motherly instinct when your child or children is in trouble). Moses came down and found all hell had broke loose with the children. Sometimes you have to know who to trust to leave your children with to hold the house together when you’re not around(Exodus 32) Moses was so angry at Aaron he asked him what did they do that he brought such a sin upon them. Aaron says, “don’t be angry Moses these people like being mischievous and asked me to make them a God to go before them cause they didn’t know where you were.”(Exodus 32:21-24) Aaron was just not stern and discipline enough to handle these children without the assist of Moses being around.

Moses had to take back control after everything was out of control when he’d left them with Aaron and God wasn’t too please with the children either, who were so disobedient, rebellious and stubborn. God called them stiff necked people and wanted to consumed them(Exodus 32:8-10) It was like God was ready to have an abortion and Moses pleaded for them (Exodus 32:11-14) But when he came down and saw what they were doing in the camp, dancing and worshipping a golden calf they made and then he cast the tablets of ten commandments at them(Exodus 32:16and19)  He understood God’s anger towards the Israelite children. Then again (Numbers 11:10) Moses heard the weeping throughout their families every man in the door of his tent and the anger of the Lord was kindled greatly and Moses got so discourage and displeased with the people that he started to rant and rage at God for giving him the responsibility for them. All of a sudden it was God’s bad children not his(Numbers 11:11-15). God had promised to be with Moses so he gave him all the help he needed so he wouldn’t feel frustrated and angry. He even gave the children what they wanted  so they would stop complaining and misbehaving(Numbers 11:16-35).

Isn’t this like typical parents to start fighting among yourselves because you have a problem with a child or children. It is never your fault or from your side of the family, somebody has to get the blame. One parent is always trying to make excuses most of the time it’s the mother and the other who is very stern at not accepting of any excuse: the father. Funny with God and Moses they switch like good cop bad cop. There are some parents who play the same game with their children, especially those going through or in a divorce where they want the kids to like them the best. And then there are those kinds of parents who want so much to be loved by and be their child or children friend that they would spoil them rotten. But not these two one is either hot or cold, and with good reason when they work together they become warm, just the right temperature to settle the matter. Doing this they were both working together as one even though there are many times one is always ready to throw in the towel and call it quit.

I can’t help but be angry at Moses meddling father-in-law Jethro(Exodus 18:14-25) for making Moses lose sight of the one accord he and God was working in for the people when he came up with the brilliant idea which got Moses weak. The reason for me saying that Jethro’s idea was the reason for Moses getting weak is before he pointed it out to Moses, what he was doing was not good for him or the people and it will wear him and the people with him out for it was too heavy for him and he is not able to perform it alone(Exodus 18:17-18) Moses didn’t even realize he wasn’t cable of handling all that was given unto him, after seeing all that God had done as he said he was going to do through him and with him to deliver the people out of Egypt. Moses knew and felt God was with him as promised so he could of only done it through him and would of continued doing it. He started out by not having enough faith in God and himself, to all faith in everything in God. Have you ever found yourself doing things or something that defies the norms and don’t even realize you shouldn’t be able too? Like being a single parent working two jobs, having dinner ready, being there for homework, showing up for after school activities, lunches made and kids tucked in bed, cleaned the house and the next day start all over trying to never miss a beat and your child or children, so well mannered and structured. Then here comes someone telling you shouldn’t or I don’t know how you do it, because if it was me I’d burn out, and I just couldn’t or wouldn’t do it. But through having faith in God you can boldly say, ” for it is by the Grace of God I am able and capable.”

Moses had, as scriptures declares in(Numbers 11:16-17), seventy spirits upon him and God decided to take off the seventy spirit  and place them upon seventy elders to help him carry the burden of the people when Moses ranted and raged about all the constant demands, wining and complaints of the people. God also ranted and raged and got angry enough, that three thousand died and were plagued (Exodus 32:28 and 35) When God came with the discipline, all bad had to go, his way definitely had an impact on the children that terrify them. Both God and Moses  always gave into whatever the children wanted and complained about. Like a typical loving parent who will never leave nor forsake their child or children no matter how bad or good, whatever they maybe. After everything Moses and God had done for these people they still weren’t satisfied they continued to whine and complain now wanting water. God had, had enough even Moses too with these people, if it was not one thing it was the other and they always go back to saying like spoiled children the same things to hurt Moses and God(Numbers 21:5-10 And the people spoke against Moses saying why did you bring us out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? there’s no bread and our soul loathes this light bread. Number 20:3-5 And the people contended with Moses and spoke saying, “if only we had died when our brethren died before the Lord! Why have you bought up the assembly of the Lord into this wilderness, that we and our animals should die here? And why have you made us to come up out of Egypt, to bring us to this evil place? It is not a place of grain or figs or vines or pomegranates nor is there any water to drink.” When they won’t fighting against God like making the golden calf as a sign of rebellion they began to complain about Moses leadership. Even Moses own brother and sister spoke out against him(sibling rivalry) and God was not pleased at what they were saying, just like a mother again and they were disciplined(Numbers 12:1-16). Numbers 21:5-10 God then sent a fiery serpents among the people and they bit them and much people of Israel died. Once again for their wining and complain, but as usual Moses plea for them and God delivered them.

Sometimes as parents the love for your child or children can make you sin your soul by getting angry at them. You do and say things you really don’t mean at times. That’s what happened to Moses at the water of Meribah  Numbers 20:8-13 God told Moses to speak to the rock instead he hit it because he was so angry at the people for their ingratitude and complaining again after everything that had been done for them. Being a parent is a gift when you could be patience, loving unconditionally, caring, forgiving and understanding. This is what I’ve learned from them both that you shall be tried in all aspects, but never give up.

If God is omnipotent (having great or absolute power or influence) why not use it against us to change things to be the way he’d want it for us instead of us putting up a fight and him giving us free will? I guess it’s because as a parent even though your child or children were created by you there’s no control over them, they weren’t created like a robot, they weren’t programed. There’s nothing other than to guide or influence them into knowing to choose that which is good and to make wise choices. If God is omniscient (having infinite or very extensive knowledge) and he knows the out come of our lives why all the struggles, frustration, and pain we must live through. I guess like a parent we can’t live our children lives for them for them to learn. They must go through their own life lessons to really understand and learn for themselves.

Moses and the Israelites were united as a family looking for stability in coming together finding a place to call their own not just where they could fit in , but was theirs. Coming to truth to who they are, the Israelites rooted in God not the world they live in or what held them a slave, but give them liberty. Moses greatest accomplishment to me was his relationship with God and to lead the people he so cared about out of slavery in Egypt. To be rooted and grounded after so long of not know where he belong even though he had fit in perfectly anyway he was placed by the grace of God an Egyptian for a time and now a Hebrew. And God, our father God whom seem to have had no idea what little monsters he created when he’d created humanity got lesson taught to him about how stubborn, disobedient, rebellious and remorseful us humans can be.

God is and will always be the parent operating in our lives. Matthew 23:9 “Call no man your father upon the earth, for one is your father, which is in heaven.” And to me anyone who shall be called mother or father, minister, teacher, whatever and is  being responsible for a human being period better be operating in one accord with God like Moses. Dealing with human beings, you definitely need divine intervention.

I can’t help this feeling I’ve been having for over the last eighteen years that there definitely has been some sort of paradigm shift; a transformation that everyone at one point in time started preaching, and  prophesying about and it didn’t matter what faith-based system of belief they belong to. Some proclaim that it was a positive change and to others, it was the worst.

It has been for centuries the prediction of the world’s end, but yet no end is in sight, to me it’s just the change of the systems of how things worked in the world. The bible does say world without end. (Ephesian 3:21) 1 John 15:15-17 It says that we should not love the world and the things of the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes and the pride of life. You see, Jesus’ death started (I proclaimed started because evil still abound) the conquering of the prince of darkness of this world, giving us believers the abilities needed to be overcomers of the devil’s temptations through the aid of the Holy ghost. We have the unction from the Holy ghost that we know all things, especially the truth, God’s truth.

The prophesy is that we are in the season of God’s silence. We were told in Psalm 46:10 “Be still and know that I am God.” And Psalm 27:1 “The Lord is my light and salvation; who shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; who shall I be afraid? In both these Psalm we are being told to have faith in God; no matter what the circumstances is in our lives he’s got our back and he’s in control. In this season, we are being tested and tried in His silence. But there is a quietness and a stillness even though it seems like everything else being heard is so loud and moving very fast.

Think of this for a moment what is God silence? when righteousness got forsaken for unrighteousness and a person having morals is outcast, as 2 Corinthians 6:14 says, “Be you not unequally yoked together with unbelievers; for what fellowship has righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion has light with darkness? it has became the norms, that no one is striking these things down immediately. There was a time it was said, you reap what you sew, if you do good, then good shall follow you, you work hard and then you get rewarded for your work. Today is like you have to get by, by luck and chance and who you know. God has been taking out of so many things today, when there was once a time nothing was operating without God. We felt blessed when doing good for others especially it being unconditionally. Today it’s like a curse with entitlement of people. There was a time you never had to worry about being blessed by your peers because you’d know that all you do was for the greater glory of God not yourself and God always in some ways rewarded you because you were never in want of anything and wherever you go and whatever you do, to even whatever happens to you, you were always blessed. But there is a silence from God whether we are the ones shutting him out or he just is.

What does the silence mean? It means that God like a father or mother who has been teaching his or her child to drive a car always sitting on the passenger seat, making sure everything is being done correctly by giving the child all direction and guidance. And as a child, we always believing, “I could do it all by myself” can’t wait for an opportunity to take the car and drive alone, just to prove to yourself and your parents you’re grown right? So God, unlike our parent, has now given us the key to the car and said, “go ahead and drive” meanwhile he already has prepared the police, lawyer, ambulance and anything we’d need in case things do not go as planned, he’ll show up. God always shows up as our defense. You see, we never have to lie or steal the car it is always up to us to take the chance knowing he is with us no matter what.

The lesson is we have been taught well, but do we understood the guidance and direction we were given? And if we do, there would be no need for his interference so his silence is merited. We may be going through what we must with God’s silence to see how well learnt we are, especially after he has given to us all that we need. But don’t be fooled God is not going to sit back and let all hell break through without Him making a move or saying something. Just because it feels like he’s silent doesn’t mean that he is not in control.

I remember the older people long ago used to say, “God always puts a hand(he helps by sending an angel in his stead), sends a man( some stranger that comes to your aid) or comes himself(Jesus)”.