Why celebrate? Because the hand of God was shown to all humanity around the world to see. Within that four minutes of totality as we immersed in the darkness, I felt something moved within me, as the darkness passes over for that moment, then sun swiftly began to shine again. I was filled with so much emotions. I was fearful, yet joyful, worried about humanity. But as my heart was filled with so much love, there was a sense of God hands moving the moon as He held the sun still, then tears fell from my Eyes. For a moment I vision Jesus on the cross again being crucified. The earth quaked, the curtain was tornado in the temple and the sun was eclipsed. I felt within my spirit that this is more than just a historical moment phenomenon. It was like God speaking to humanity, “ you do know truth, even to when things are going to take place and has taken place, but yet you have no control, I am in control.” Even though we were given the knowledge of this phenomenon there was nothing man could have done, it was all in Gods hands. A confession of the existence of God we can’t deny. Not even ignorance or science can explain the purpose of the eclipse or could take away what was felt in my spirit, “truth of God existence revealed.”

God has shown that darkness is but for a moment, and light cannot be overshadowed by darkness it will still find a way to shine through. Darkness is passing through y’all. We must be careful not to find ourselves overshadowed by the darkness. “Please don’t go over to the dark side.” Times are very difficult and our flesh will be tested. Be aware of thoughts in your mind and heart, that are going to be over taken by ego. Ego is going to make you feel entitled, everything is about you, and you come first before everyone and everything. Your love is going to run cold, etc. Stand in faith recognizing a child of God is about love and humility. When you find love is slipping away from you and bitterness and hate is trying to take control, pray. Pray and plead with the Holy Spirit to be not withdrawn from you, help you to discern and remember who Jesus is in you and whose you are. Remain in the light at all cost! The darkness is inviting and tempting, before you know it you’re justifying evil as being good. Some people are already on the dark side saying evil is good, can’t discern between right and wrong, fallen and have no idea.

There’s a time and season for everything according to scriptures, Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. We’re in a time of war, killing, tearing down, weeping and mourning, time to scatter, time to refrain from embracing, time to give up, time to throw away, time to speak, and a time to hate. The present of Lord is also prevalent, as the wows of life will increase. Those who have faith will understand it like a woman in labour; our troubles and suffering will not cease until the Lord’s will be done in earth, and it will feel like the spirit of God has left the world, but hold on, it’s within you. Those who don’t lose faith but continue to pray will be anchored in the Lord to withstand these trying times.

Covid 19 pandemic deaths, lockdowns and isolation, Donald Trumps presidency, all that had taken place like the death of George Floyd Jr. etc., the fires, war in Ukraine, tornado, hurricane, earthquakes, war in Jerusalem, old diseases returning, every man/woman through fame and fortune looked upon as a star or to idolize, has fallen from grace in our sight, the leap-year and now the eclipses. Humanity, through the wisdom, knowledge and understanding of the Heavenly Father, if well learnt, we can change our destiny from our own destruction, to victory over the enemy and sin through obedience to God. God is waiting for us all to gather before Him as we did for the eclipse, prepared with the word within our mind, body and soul, as we were with our glasses. The Word is our protective shield from the enemy. We need possess it to break through the chains of the enemy to get to His presence.

Romans 6:23 “ For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 3:23-24 All of us have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory. But God treats us much better than we deserve, and because of Christ Jesus, he freely accepts us and sets us free from our sins.

Jesus prophesied to Peter that Satan was going to come after him. First Peter had proclaimed that Jesus is the son of God; then the next moment he pleaded with Jesus not to go to be crucified. Matthew 16:13: 23. And at the last supper Peter once again proclaimed that he was ready to go with Jesus to prison or to death, when Jesus predicted to him, the rooster will crow three times and he will deny him. Luke 22:34.

Peter, truly loved Jesus and could have never perceived himself doing against him. We art to consider deeply within ourselves this question, “what then caused him to?” The fact Jesus was able to predict Peter’s betrayal speak volume of his comprehends with the struggles man endures because of sin. Peter was adamant to stand with Jesus even proof when he cut off the ear of the soldiers and Jesus had rebuked him, John 18:10-11.

Was Judas a worst sinner than Peter? We all know it’s because of him Jesus was captured and taken to be crucified, being paid thirty pieces of silver. Jesus also predicted that he was the one whom would betray him; being the one he’d dipped his bread in the dish and gave a piece. As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him. John 13: 21-27.

Noticed in the presence of Jesus Satan wasn’t welcome, neither did he present himself. Judas had already collected the thirty pieces of silver, but yet carried on like he had no idea he would ever be the one to betray Jesus. Think for a moment deeply, was he telling the truth? Like Peter I believe he truly believed he wasn’t, because it was only when given the dipped bread, with Jesus permission, Satan then entered him. His feet were washed as being part with Jesus, he wasn’t excluded from the rest of disciples as Jesus’s own. John 13:2-11. When realizing what he had done to Jesus Judas killed himself. Matthew 27:3-10. Satan had entered in Judas, but when he had accomplished his evil, left Judas. The love Judas had for Jesus is what broke him when realizing he was wrong for betraying him. But regardless, it was God’s plan and purpose just like with Job, wasn’t it now? Just think about this for a moment. Satan was given permission once again. He came upon Peter to prevent Jesus in a deceptive manner not go and be crucified, immediately after Peter had proclaimed Jesus the son of God.

From light to darkness, good to bad, righteous to unrighteousness when would it ever stop, the conflict in man because of sin. Between both Peter and Judas only God can judge. And just because Judas killed him self doesn’t mean his sin was greater, it was once again choice. God surely didn’t kill him, he predicted he was going to do it. Matthew 26:24. Peter had felt exactly the same way after denying Jesus and decided was to quit being a disciple and go back to fishing. Jesus after his resurrection went to Peter to restored him back to fellowship. John 21.

Psalm 51, the psalm of forgiveness proves, according to David verse 17 “ The sacrifice of God is a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart, O God thou will not despise.”

The wages of sin is death and we all die, no one lives forever. None is without sin, so we can’t cast any stones. Romans 7:18-22For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God’s law, but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.

There’s no greater love shown to humanity than Jesus who laid down his life for us with an unconditional love in spite of our ingratitude. “Crucify, crucify him was the shout, from those who followed him received miracles and those his haters whom were envious and jealous and fearful of him. The stranger who only knew him for what he had said and done. But as a man would do, Jesus didn’t retaliate with malice or hate, especially to those closest to him like Peter who denied him and Judas who betrayed him. Jesus had predicted everything that was going to happen to him, yet he surrendered to it all without any repercussions to anyone other than himself; allowing them to crucify him.

As followers of Christ, we know we have an enemy within(ourselves) and without(devil) to conquer. Jesus was one with the Father, as we his follower must also be one with him. How can we be following him and don’t have love in us as he does for all sinners? Unconditional love, is what allows you to surrender like him when crucified, not on a cross, but in your heart and mind, so devastatingly wounded, a hurt to the point of brokenness of your spirit. We are of flesh and blood, but the comfort of the Holy Ghost, the gift of Jesus to us, within guides and gives us the strength to press on.

The greatest commandment said by Jesus is one, love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. And the second is, love your neighbour as yourself.

Let’s not loose sight of what Jesus came into this world to do for humanity; how and why it was done. John 3:16- 17 For Gos so loved the world that, he gave his only begotten Son…For God did not send his son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. It all began with love when God had sent his son and end with it. His presence is found whenever love strongly abides.

I rather say being Christ like, than following Christ. “Why? Because I acknowledge and accepted when I was baptized, He’s in me and I in Him. With no strength nor power of my own, I surrendered.

Being baptized was the best thing I had done for my life. I thought life will be smooth sailing from then on. I had believed according to what I was told or maybe misunderstood, and that is, baptism was going to make every bad thing in life better. I would be delivered from the bondage of sin, and set free. But I was ever so wrong, and it was the beginning of a troublesome, fearful, trial of my faith in God. Jesus was led by the spirit after being baptized to go on a retreat, fasting and praying, so was I. No solid food to eat just hot water and sometimes glucose in it. But I was fed in the spirit , I never felt hungry, neither thirsty. God is real!

Everything was great like I had expected it when being Christ like, but then the devil show up when I felt like I was walking on air, just floating in the spirit in His grace and glory. I felt like what the Israelites and Aaron saw on Moses face after coming down the mountain from the presence of God, Exodus 34:29-35. As I walked in my calling about my Father’s business, preaching, teaching, healing and prophesying… The threats to my life and family was frightening and unbearable. Matthew 5:16 “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” They don’t glorify the Father, they are too busy trying to destroy you for the light, God is completely out of their mind and thought. If they would acknowledge God, they would understand it’s His light not yours. You are just Hid vessel. The devil takes control over them, and they become deaf, blind and ignorant and gravitate to possess what I call Cain mentally. After killing his brother Abel had the nerve to ask God, “ am I my brother’s keeper.” Genesis 4:1-13.

Never have I ever believed when I had excepted to be Christ like, I was going to be crucified like him for loving and caring about humanity with their ingratitude, envy and jealousy. Those you love and all who are acquainted, like Jesus disciples, also are affected by being judged, hated and outcasted because of you. Your light is an influence to draw people in a positive way, but negativity also gravitates to your light, I had to learn and accept. It’s your tears and pleas of the heart for the love of those who wrongfully hurt you and cries for your persecution for no apparent reason you; your haters. God knows and understands a heart issue, love that kills a person quickly on a cross. When you are able say, “forgive them they know not what they do.” But if you’re bitter and resentful your bones will be broken and only then you die fast.

It took me years to recognize and understand that, “ even though , I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil…Psalm 23:4 and Isaiah 54:17 “No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn…Romans 8:31 “If God is for you, who can be against you? I was filled with fear, doubt and hopelessness. I didn’t keep my eyes on God, walking in faith. I was distracted by the sight of the things going on in the world. Faith can take you out of the world’s reality into Gods existence of glory and all truth of “the meaning of life is?” Romans 8:28 “All things God works for good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Truly lost my way going through menopause. I remember going through puberty, and boy to me, it felt like I blew through it so fast, only because I couldn’t wait to be grown up. But there’s nothing like being already grown and not looking forward to go any further, age wise. You know the older you get, time is no longer on your side. Tick tock, tick tock, the clock is counting down on your youthfulness, vitality, wittiness, good looks…surely, but slowly fading away. The only thing left in you is to grow in wisdom, knowledge and understanding of the meaning of life. I felt at times life is changing my appearance and mind once again completely different from the day of my birth. These stages in life, from in our mother’s womb, infancy, toddler, childhood, puberty, adolescence, adulthood, middle age and then senior, it seems like we never stop changing, so we can grow in the grace and humility onto our Heavenly Father as preparation to present ourselves in his presence.

No woman should have to be ashamed and embarrassed to be told you’re just like your mother, it should be an honour and greatest compliment. As a woman of God it is a blessing to walk and be seen with virtue and grace. A woman of God daughter should be an reflection of her in His grace. When you feel like you’ve lost yourself, God some how allow you to find out and see who you are through your daughter in her characteristic, personality and in the way she interacts with others. What has she learned by observing you, woman of God and mother. The love and bond between you both would helps in the recall of “I remember when,” the moments of your life like video on rewind, you reflect. I found this to be a fact in my experience with my daughter. I recall praying to God to bless me with a daughter and finally the blessing was bestowed upon me and it changed my life. I knew from the day I looked into her eyes as I held her in my arms at her birth, my life had to reflect all I wanted for her, especially with my relationship with God. And this can only be attained with an unbreakable relationship with the Heavenly Father. I believe this is not something hereditary, but spiritually. I truly believe my daughter is an extension of me God wanted to remain in the world after I passed on. Everyone I meet would say such good things about my daughter reminded me of the things I heard people spoke of me that also made my father so proud to say I’m his child. My legacy may not be material or anything I have done spectacularly for me to leave in this world, but God’s light within my spirit shine through her. The bond I have with him is also with her. Now that I recognized it in her, I have to train her in the way she’ll never depart and pray that it remains, for the struggle and fight I’ve endured I know she also will endure in remaining close to him.

Not every mother can recognizes the spiritual implications of being a mother and the importance of mother daughter relationship with the strong bonds to God. The greatest example of this is Mother Ann and her daughter Mary, the mother of Jesus. Not mentioned much about in the Bible, but this mother and daughter dual God has used to change the world. Mother Ann started with her faithfulness in God. She was past child bearing years when Mary was born, it is believed that Mary was also miraculously conceived as Jesus was conceived later by Mary. It is written that Mother Ann taught her small daughter to read scripture and she was taken to the temple to live among virgin. Mother Mary continued in faith as her mother had taught and she observed of her mother. She was chosen to be the Mother of Jesus. From these two faithful women, we are to look how far all Mother’s and daughter has come or should have come in relationship towards one another and especially due to their deep bond in faith and relationship to the Lord.

Let’s all be aware of our calling as mothers and daughters by walk in faithfulness unto Lord with love, unity and humility together whether you’re a mother biological, adopted or spiritually.

Ask yourself the one question no one can answer besides you, “is God real? No one can answer that question for you, not your parents or going to church. Some of us go through all the emotions and traditional rituals in hope some how we’ll attain what it takes to be spiritual and grow spiritually.

We’re in the ninth month, September 2023, which to me is about birthing and shifting from one thing to another. God is calling for us to not only change, but to recognize the changes we’re going through. We’re equipped for the calling in our lives. For so long fear, known as anxiety, mental health issues, curses, words of men mouth has fallen upon you, lies of the enemy, envy, jealousy, hatred…has taking hold. But it’s time to be loosed from this bondage. It’s a generational curse that has been like a ball of chain you’ve been dragging around all your life that the lord has now given you the wisdom, knowledge and understanding about. You can’t be free if you don’t know or acknowledge your bound. We can see for other, but as a child of God, He see for you.

When God has called you, it’s from the time you’ve been conceived in your mother’s womb. Everything about your life, good and bad has been preparing you for the plan, He has for your life. You may get off course, but some how or the other faith brings you back on track. You’re not like other people. You can’t do what others do and get the same results. Your path always leads to an expected end, His Will. You can’t cheat, lie, or manipulate. Truth is revealed in you alway, so you have to be careful in what you do and say. You’re a light, when you just want to be normal; hidden and discreet. Your good works is through Him, because no power or strength do you have of your own.

When you’re down, no one can take the credit for lifting you up. He sees and knows everything about you. When He doesn’t come himself, he always sends someone in your life, a stranger(man or woman of God), family or friend to speak a word to you. He even speaks to you in dreams and in visions. Never allowing anything to happen without a warning. The angels appears to minister and counsel you whatever you may be going through especially when fears and anxiety comes to over you in doing what he has called you to do. Who are the angels? The people who appears and then disappears out of your lives just when everything in okay.

“Our God is a good God!” “And He’s as real as you and I are to one another. Just because we can’t see Him, or prayed and didn’t get what we wanted, never had an encounter or just don’t believe in Him, doesn’t negate His existence. God doesn’t possess us, in other words, forces us to believe in Him. But He ask our permission to allow Him to come into our lives. Just as we don’t have to believe in life or death, but yet it exists, but so does our God, as my testimony.

Luke 2:49 He said to them, “why did you seek me? Did you not know that I must be about my Father’s business?” Jesus was proud to acknowledge his obedience to his Father’s will, despite the consequences of being left behind and his parents frantically searching for him. “What an extraordinary example for us, especially as adults to follow, Jesus was just a twelve years old.

One thing I would say, “the churches has to stop promoting tithing as God needing money.” Tithing is kingdom business, and this business is about being a part of something greater than ourselves. If you’re not a true member(being apart of the one body of believers), then donate. I believe donation works for those who are on the outside coming in for the first time to church, but hesitant to join. Someone who’d show up for special events or seasons such as Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving and New Year’s Eve service. Donate because you’re not obligated to a ten percent, it’s whatever and whenever you want to give or could afford, financially. It’s a way of giving support, especially if the church lifted your spirit compared to how you first entered. If the service and the congregation placed an amazing feeling deep down in your soul that money can’t buy, then give to keep that experience going, not just for you, but for someone else. You we’re hungry and got fed, now feed someone. The church is made up of many volunteers, but money still plays an important role. No matter what, money is required for everything in the world, nothing is free.

Tithe means tenth in Hebrew. The custom of tithing is biblical, so both Christians and Jews practice tithing as part of their faith. Tithe is 10% of your income given as an offering to your church.

The churches has to stop using tithing as an insurance policies, and some sort spontaneous falling of blessings and favour to come into our lives. Tithing should be the moving of the spirit within you, and willingness of your heart and mind, not a manipulation of your soul. When like Jesus said, “I must be about my Father’s business” your Father business is kingdom building. How could you not prioritize doing the will of the Father. Tithing is one of the requirement for Kingdom building in the world, and it take obedience and discipline to fulfill.

In the spiritual realm you’re required hundred percent, but in the natural only ten. Just imagine tithing being apart of your spirit in the body. Ten percent of spirit can be the reason sin is prevalent in us. Ninety percent of our entire being, only ten percent of God breath in us made us a living being. With only ten percent of God in us look what we can do and be as humans. Just imagine if we had hundred percent, then we ourselves would be Gods. We can only make up the other ninety percent by unity with each other and God. “Think about this for moment.”

The misunderstanding concerning the church and money has being going on for far too long. The church should never let money be its primary focus. The more members, like mega churches the more money so many people believe will bring wealth to their churches. When it should be the more members the more souls for the Lords kingdom. Another thing the church have to stop saying the money(tithing) is for God. God doesn’t need money, it’s a worldly thing and we all know God is a spirit and His ways are not like ours, neither is His thoughts. And we must understand just like we don’t need to feed, cloth, give Him a place to live…nor drive Him anywhere. God need’s definitely is not like our. And to think of it, does He even have needs? “Come on now, He’s God!” We need money to survive in this world, let’s be realistic. Because for us, money feed, cloth, puts a roof over your head…nothing is free. Money is a current medium of exchange for goods and services. The churches should be receiving tithe to help pay bills, the church affairs, and making sure its members and less fortunate in their communities never be without. The church needs money just like we do to pay for the things that makes life possible to survive, not God. There’s nothing God needs that He can’t supply as scripture says all things are possible with God.

Yes, the Lord will provide and He’s asking us to help out one another just as He’s there to helping us out. Gave and it shall be given unto you…scripture declares, Luke 6:38. I was told, “freely give and freely, you shall receive.” One of the requirements for kingdom business is giving. I’ve learned you don’t only give because you want to receive, give because giving can be your only sacrifice, if we truly intend to follow Jesus all the way. Jesus has already gone to the cross, we are not required to go. But we are required to make some kind of a sacrifice. The Lord provides as we bring forth a sacrifices. You see, it’s in the working together with the Lord that makes the world a better. I speak of money as a sacrifice for many, because for poor people especially, it is the greatest sacrifice, and as for the rich it’s hardest to part with, afraid of what life would be without it. You never hear the rich wants to be poor, but the poor always want to be rich. Why? Because money is power, advantage, material things and accessibility whereby being poor is limitation, disadvantages and hard work to earn to just get by. And it’s not just about money, sacrifice is also about surrendering yourself fully to His will and purpose, even if you’re unaware and afraid of what it may require of you.

Ten percent of your income, one day out of seven and one hour out twenty-four day He asks of us; not that He needs it, but we do. It is always for our wellbeing God ask anything of us. This obedience to the will and purpose of God concerning kingdom business is the sacrifice we must make until the abolishment of sin in the world. We would of never have to tithe, make sacrifices or even concern ourselves about kingdom business if it hadn’t been for sin. But the rebuilding of our relationship with God because of our separation due to sin is costing us. Before we didn’t have a price to pay. Adam and Even got everything for free and now because of their sin, we got a price to pay.

I never like giving money to the church, simply because I saw the poor who already don’t have, willing to do anything to get more in their lives and the churches are filled with the vulnerable poor who will give their everything to the church trusting and believing for a miracle to in their lives. While the rich is too busy being rich, when they would be the greatest asset to the church in helping out the poor. Many are called, but few chosen. “Don’t get me wrong, I do acknowledge there are some rich people who knows what’s it’s like to be poor, and recognizes the Lord has blessed them to be a blessing and they do give to the churches and communities.”

I started only giving to the church for the sake of thanking God. I had to pray first about giving my money for years before I could trust to give, and miracles and favours kept happening in my life afterward like God saying back to me, “you’re welcome!” And that response resonated in the blessings and favours in my life. As for churches I’d given tithes and donations to, in which I got absolutely nothing back, not to say, I was giving to get, but the fact that God didn’t answer me in any way, now I realized they had a form of godliness, wasn’t really about God, but money, exploiting the vulnerable and their faith in God.

Tithing is difficult especially in todays world where money is everything for survival. There’s no more middle class, you’re rich or you’re poor. To give your hard earn money to another source after paying bills, taking care of your lively hood and taxes. Tithing is a faithful and spiritual matter between man and God. The tithing in the days of Moses is much different than when Jesus came. Jesus fulfilled the Old Testament and created a new, through his life, death and resurrection. Let your tithing be whatever you want it to be in your relationship with God. To me it’s my gratitude, sacrifice, worship, weapon, seed and my praise. “Anything about kingdom business to me, should be taken serious, and it’s between you and God through prayer and fasting.”

Galatians 6:7 “Do not be deceived; God is not mocked, for you reap whatever you sow.” In the matter of kingdom business Jesus laid the foundation and we all have a job to do in keeping the progress of building going until Jesus returns. The choice is all our!

Exodus 4:11-13 The Lord said to him, “who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.” But Moses said, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.”

Like Moses, I truly feel the same way, “pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.” So many people would wish for such thing, but when you’ve experienced the evil of the devil…And it’s not just because I don’t know who God is in my life, but I am a sinner, born into sin as scriptures declares. Wanting to be this perfect person to represent anything to do with the Lord. Afraid of my sins being revealed knowing the devil is always a ready. Understanding God doesn’t put us in Judgment of one another sins, but to help lead others out from sin, as he also led us. I may not have found myself worthy to do what the Lord has asked of me, but I sure wanted to be worthy of being delivered from my sin, and not go hell. Only then, I truly understood what he was asking of me to do. Sometimes we’ve got to understand it’s not always about me/I, being selfish, but selfless. We often forget who God is, by try to challenge him. If only Adam and Eve had challenged the devil when it came to eating the forbidden fruit as we challenge God, we wouldn’t be in this predicament. “When God is calling answer and be obedient.”

Vision: As I stood waiting on the sea shore at the arrival of the boat, as they draw nearer and begun to anchor it for me board a stranger approached to me and whispered in my ear, “Captain” what do you mean? I asked, but He then vanished. I thought it crazy for I knew nothing about being a captain. All I knew is to row a boat and be a passenger in it. Navigate, row and anchor the boat, “how hard can it be, if that’s all to it,” so I thought to myself. Didn’t anticipate a storm, wasn’t prepared for it. The storm was the darkness I was afraid to confront. “Not by sight, but by faith,”echoed in my thoughts. I prayed, “come Holy Spirit, teach, lead and guide me, for I need you now more than ever.”

Learning to confront struggles takes faith being the light needed,to get through darkest moments in the storm, like the boat being destroyed and lives lost. The sea wasn’t friendly, it became an enemy to fight against. It all started off so calm, but like life, the waves beat upon the boat trying to take it under and the thunder and lightening was so loud it penetrated my soul with fear. I cried out, “Jesus help me, please. Sorry for being naive, believing it would be easy.”But according to Psalm 124:1 If it had not been the Lord who was on our side, I got through it. “Nothing is ever easy in our own strength when it comes to fulfilling Gods will and purpose for our lives.”

Can’t believe the Lord after all these years of giving me a responsibility that I allowed the enemy dominion using fear to prevent me from fulfilling. But still He granted me favour even though I don’t feel worthy. I’ve been isolated, isolated because of fear and with it came bitterness, unworthiness, resentment, doubt, hopelessness…most of all disobedience, finding myself petrified to do what the Lord asked of me. It is hard to serve the Lord in a sinful word, with a devil always after you. In my isolation I had learned to understand the moving of the Lord in my life without the help of any man as the Lord showed Himself to me to be the only one I need. Finally acknowledging all the glory, honour, worship and praise belongs to God and God alone for it is He, to whom all things are possible. The Creator, whom with all power and authority over everything has blessed me with knowledge, wisdom and understanding to recognize his presence within, above, beneath, and surrounding me. I can finally discern His presence in others and to recognize the adversary the devil presence, especially when possessing someone who’s after me filled with hate for no reason. I could of asked the Lord to make me rich and famous, but that would only be ignorant after all I’ve been through walking with Him. My fruitfulness, blessings and favour is all in my obedience to Him. Psalm 23:1 “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. Matthew 6:33 “seek first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.”

Another vision and explanation: I saw Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane, Jesus in the wilderness for forty days being tempted by the devil and then Jesus on the cross. Why the vision? There are three meanings behind the vision beginning with Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane: some consider this the place of pressing, like the oil press. The garden of Eden foreshadow the garden of Gethsemane because sin began in a garden with disobedience and now it ended in a garden with obedience. Like Eve, a woman disobedience when ate from the forbidden fruit tree, caused us to fall and Mother Mary of our saviour Jesus, a woman of obedience, who said yes to the angel to give birth to him, caused us to rise again. Jesus unlike Adam was able to overcome the the weaknesses of the soul, being obedient to the will of the Father. The garden of Gethsemane is the battleground for the soul of us all through Jesus. A testifying of the victory over free will to the submission to the will of God. To me it was like being back in the garden of Eden, being consumed with the fear, doubts and hopelessness awakened in Adam and Eve after eating the forbidden fruit and the hurt the Father felt when having to to put them out the garden. Jesus had a fight to enter the garden of Eden as the man Jesus. It says that his sweat was like drops of blood it was His soul not flesh being pierced by the flaming sword as he entered in with humility and submission to the Father. He had entered the spiritual realm carrying onto himself every human emotions to overcome it. Luke 22:44 And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.

Jesus in the wilderness: the wilderness is to purify and renew the spirit within man. The wilderness is the place of isolation, brokenness, and vulnerability where we wholeheartedly put all faith and trust in the Lord to lead and guide us, resisting all temptations that may come our way and to be anchored in the Heavenly Father to overcome all our human frailty and bondage of sin that we may press forward to the calling of the Lord on our lives.

Jesus on the cross: the cross is the place of authority, power and control over sin. Jesus stripped off the garments of skin God made to clothed Adam and Eve when found naked after eating the forbidden fruit, Genesis 3:21. Jesus replaced the garments symbolically with His blood(spirit). It’s the place humanity in Christ was heightened and healed from the breaking of the strong hold of sin within man that only the sacrifice of all God and a drop of man, God in man, taking our sin upon himself to eradicate it, can accomplish such a task. God wanted us to have a permanent fix. Salvation couldn’t be done anymore by the sacrificing of animals, but by son of God. Before Jesus even went to the cross to fulfill him mission the Father declared, “this is my son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased,” Matthew 3:17. God knew our salvation was already done from that moment. So it was no surprise in the Garden of Gethsemane, though it seems so emotional and painful, it was love, unconditional love, being poured out of Jesus for the sorrow, broken heart, and hopelessness he felt for man, whom he recognized truly needed a saviour. Even after all the disciples had witnessed, been taught, and shown secretly…they still couldn’t be anchored in faith to sustain themselves. He said to them to watch and pray, that they enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is will, but the flesh is weak, they fell asleep leaving Jesus to fight alone for them, Matthew 26:40-45.

Jesus completed seven important tasks(sayings) at the cross for us to meditate on before he died. 1: At the cross Jesus cries out, “forgive them Father for they know not what they do, Luke 23:34 2: I thirst, John 19:28. 3: My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?Matthew 27:46. 4: Father into thy hands I commend my spirit.” Luke 23:46 He was still working making things right up to the last moment of his life. 5: He told one of to the two men that hung next to him who asked, “today shalt thou be with me in paradise, Luke 23:43. 6: His Mother Mary, “ woman, behold thy son! Behold, thy mother!John 19:26-27 7: It is finished, John 19:30. Not in the right chronological order, but you get what I mean. Seven is the number of completion and with all Jesus said and done on the cross, all humanity was in completion for transformation in restoration and renewal through his death and resurrection.

Our worthiness is predicated on God and God alone when chosen. We don’t have to be afraid or to find excuses such as unworthiness…to do what God has called us to do. “With a humble heart, like Mother Mary, say to the Lord, “be it unto me according to thy word,” Luke 1:38. Jesus has done all the hard work for us already. We are called to empty ourselves, and it’s our choice to submit willingly to God and be filled, protected and guided by the Holy Ghost to fulfill the will and purpose of the Father, like Jesus. It’s no longer an animal skin to cover our nakedness, (shame) Adam and Eve. Our shame is not what God had required of us, it was obedience. Now once again through the life death and resurrection of Jesus our saviour are we blinded to our shame in which was disclosed through our disobedience in the eating of the forbidden fruit. But now sighted in faith; fixated only on the things pertaining to our Heavenly Father. “Yes!” The devil would try with you, but once you’re under the covering of the Almighty, he can’t touch you. He will shake and break many things around you to try to get at your soul and distract you, but know the Lord will keep you covered. You’ll only realize what happened that could have killed or hurt you deeply, after it had fully passed, but had no effect on you or your loved ones.

I was once confused by people who would refer to John 14:6 “I am the way and the truth and the life…No one comes to the Father except through me.” Confused because the same people who would quote this scripture consider it blasphemous to pray the Rosary or pray to any particular saint for intercession, like St. John, St. Peter, St. James, St. Paul…the apostles and disciples chosen by Jesus Himself, to continue the building of the kingdom of God through the gospel. They never have a problem with recognizing themselves, being praised and worshipped as though they are God. I don’t hear them saying, to see me is to see Jesus. Instead I hear it’s my church, my followers, I built this church…Where is the acknowledgment that it is through Christ. Hey we’re human and can get carried away, caught up in self, see and also lose sight at times of God within and surrounding us.

If Jesus is the way, the truth and the life, there many times with these modern Pharisees and Sadducees I had a problem in seeing Jesus truly shining through them. They are arrogant, self-righteous, religious, judgmental, legalist…with a self-made ticket to heaven. Just because you chose to be educated to preach, and you have followers, doesn’t mean you were chosen and ordained by God for such a calling on your life. A calling on your life is not about the amount people you have filling up the seats in the church or the money you earn. It is the lives you’ve touched and changed through God.

God is not jealous if we get praise for doing what He’s called us to, but with all humility when we acknowledge Him for our obedient to His will and purpose the praise we receive comes from directly from God himself. Those in close relationships to God understand that it’s not about them, but the work they do through Him who is worthy of it all. And like Jesus who glorifies his Father in every thing he had said and done. John 5:19 “Verily verily, I say unto you, the son can do nothing of himself, but what he sees the Father do: for what things so ever he does, these also does the son likewise.”

Mother Mary and Jesus had shared a bond like no other, a mother and child in the womb. Not even the disciples could had that connection with Jesus. Only if you’re a mother and had experienced what it is like to be pregnant. You and that baby become one sometimes even after that umbilical cord. And if any mother like myself remained spiritually connected, called it mother intuition. For example you could be on date night with your husband and call the sitter and say the baby is up go check on him/her sure enough it was true. Asleep and then suddenly waking out of your sleep to rush into his/her room and the baby is having breathing problems, baby cries which all children do, but this is different cry and you mind says take him/her to the hospital immediately and then the baby has a seizure for the first time in the presence of professional that could assist you. This is the kind of relationship Jesus had with the Father and us right now should be having with Jesus if the distractions of todays world wasn’t so loud we can’t hear and sin so rampant we can’t discern and the devil so cunning we are falling into his trap of seduction and temptation.

“Jesus is the way, the truth and the life.” Why only through him can we come to the Father? Because through Adam and Eve sin has entered into man causing death separating us from God. God is life, everlasting life and a spirit. Anything that must come must come before God can’t be a dead thing, just his presence will bring it to life and sin is not what God wants to live and exist within man forever. Jesus, to summon it up is obedience, the manifestation to God’s will and purpose. He’s the example for all humans who like Adam and Eve has been disobedient what could happen if you choose to be obedient unto God. The obedience to God is guidance, protection, miracles, blessings and the inability to stand against the devil with power and authority. This is why Jesus says, come follow me, do like I do. Jesus taught with his actions, words and being.

Exodus 18 Jethro Moses father-in-law when he saw Moses taking on the responsibility of trying to handle all the people problems by himself. Mose was judge, jury and prosecutor for them all. Jethro told Moses to delicate some of the responsibility to the true God fearing men in the camp, so he wouldn’t burn himself out. Jesus chose twelve disciples and like Moses delicate to them, but with power and authority through his name and the moving of the Holy Spirit. We are to be the witnesses, intercessors, and teachers of the gospel not called by ourselves, but our Lord and saviour, Jesus Christ in service to the will and purpose of the Father in heaven.

What am I saying? I am saying that the Blessed Mother Mary, her son Jesus spirit is in her from the womb and only activated it at the cross when saying to John to take care of her as his own mother, John 19:26-27. She increased as he had decreased. I always think about Micheal Jackson mother after his death and how much she loved him and he, her. And after his passing how much she carried the weight of his fame; to loving and continuing raising his children with all the love she had for him. The disciples got the fullness of the Jesus spirit on the day of Pentecost, but Mary always had it. After all Jesus had grown in her womb conceived by the Holy Spirit, Luke 1:34-35.

I am able to write these things because it was revealed to me when I asked God to allow me to know His true, not the polluted, interpretations, confusing, contradictory truth told by the enemy, through praying and fast. Withdrawal in isolation from the things of the world.

Once we have a steadfast relationship with God we acknowledge it’s never our will, but His will that is being done through us. We never take credit for it, but lift Him up.

For the disobedience of Adam and Eve to God, we have a pay to price, and that is sin(imperfections of man) which lead to death. Genesis 2:15-17 “you are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”(NIV) Notice at that time, God was never worried about telling man not to eating from the tree of life. I believe he was never worried because eternal life with Him as man being freshly new creature, was God’s plan from the beginning. Nothing was ever suppose to have come between God and man, but free will and the devil did.

We weren’t meant to live forever with such knowledge of good and evil which is too high for us to possess, we weren’t created for such power that separated us from God. “Why?” Because we were not yet equipped to handle it. Good and evil became a corruption to the mind, body and soul, like the quaking of the will and purpose of God in us through disobedience. We were like babies and milk (breast of God) was all we should of cling to, not meat (apart from God, the forbidden tree) for our nourishment. But God’s main concern was Genesis 3:22 And the Lord God said, “now that man has become like one of us, knowing good and evil, what if he should stretch out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever!” He was mostly concerned that this imperfection, corruptible and enslaving thing (sin, separate from God) in man is detrimental to our existence. Look at the struggles and difficulties sin has caused in our lives; it has separated us from the Lord in such a mighty and powerful way that we were lost, confused, hopeless, helpless…imagine living forever like that. But thank God for Jesus!

Man was created in the image of God, not to be a mini God. If the angels held a position, a purpose with the Lord, man must also. After all, God is about will and purpose to my understanding. I believe we were never to be servants, but to be served by God himself, our provider. It was only after man had fallen, he had to labour for everything he needed, being thrown out the garden of Eden, Genesis 3:16-19, 23-24. We became like a seed gone wild like weeds, because of contamination of the soil. But yet, the Lord has never stop serving man, he sent His only begotten son to serve and redeem man.

I also believed man was distinctly created by God, being nothing like the angels, but yet in their coming together (Adam, Eve and the deceptive angel) for the first time both disrespected the sovereignty of the Most High by their actions, one being disobedient and the other a liar. But being the God of love, mercy, forgiveness…He had a plan already to resolve the dilemma between them both and to make the world as created to be, with love, joy and peace.

God didn’t separate fallen man from the fallen angel, but yet put them to exist together saying, “and I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel.” What was he saying? He was saying that there would be no peace between them.

Was this not part of God’s plan? God is omniscience and omnipresent, why would God be calling to Adam and Eve, “where are you?”Genesis 3:9. Could it be that God called out to man, because He wanted to try and test man. After all they failed at obedience, and maybe now, He wants to see if they are capable with telling the truth. God had to have known they were too innocent and fragile like babies, especially to withstand the devil, “or did He now?”

If Jesus hadn’t come and understood what it’s like to be a man living with sin, just think, we wouldn’t have been given Grace. Grace had to been given unto man, for the our Lord walk with us, talk to us, and became one of us, he took our sin upon himself to deliver us, Hebrews 4:15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weakness, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. The ultimate sacrifice for our salvation and yet there’s still more work for Jesus to do to complete our freedom from the burden of sin. So this enslaving struggle, difficulty and burden between good and evil which led to our imperfections will soon come to and end at the return of Jesus. Right now it’s impossible when the work is not completed. All that Jesus had done for us is to draw us back to God as we were meant to be, through his life and death. No more separation, the gap has been filled. Unlike Adam and Eve, this time we must be obedient in keeping of our renewal and restoration.

Jesus came for the deliverance of man, but there’s still a devil to fight and remove, once and for all. The door to salvation has been opened for all, but the devil needs to be no longer around to influence. This imperfection (separation, sin) influenced by the devil that weigh so hard on man, like a roller coaster having us sometimes up, and then down, none stop. We are given the authority to resist him, in which we must, because our problems has been solved, through the life and death of Jesus, now it’s the devil’s turn for him problem, issues, whatever to be solved.

For this reason I am so tired of those who like the Pharisees and Sadducees who have nothing better to do as Christians, but to sit around finding faults in others, especially fellow Christians by their criticizing and judging whatsoever is preach or being done by others. They are making themselves to be the only ones with the knowledge of truth and righteousness of God, according to themselves only, sure not God. This being a perfect walking in faith person is the only way to get into heaven, is a lie. The expectation of man being perfect since the fall is not from God. Romans 3:23-24 (NIV) For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. “Whose report do you believe?”

The purity of our lives has been tainted with this thing called sin, separating us from God that we are fighting within and without. Upon the wisdom, knowledge and understanding living in the millennium, we all should know there’s no one perfect, but God himself. The perfection we are to achieved is to be like Jesus when he said, “to see me is to see the Father, the Father and I are one.” Meaning they are inseparable!John 10:30-14:9. We are to have a solid and strong relationship with God that cannot be shaken.

Good and evil to me as I understand is will and purpose according to Romans 8:28 “all things works for good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Another example is Joseph and his brothers Genesis 50:20 (NIV) “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done,…

I will end with what Jesus said, “let him who is without sin cast the first stone.”John 8:7