Matthew 27:46 “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani? Which means, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” There’s an interpretation to this that stipulates Jesus was crying out to fulfill what was written in Psalm 22. Don’t know how truthful this is and can’t judge either.

How many times have we ourselves cried out this same thing to God, and have honestly, without a doubt, felt this way. Jesus who says, “to see me, is to see the father, the father and I are one. It is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work.” John 14:9-10 Why would he cry out to himself, is he not God in the flesh 1Timothy 3:16? First Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane crying out to the Father to take the cup from him. Matthew 26:39. The question is what is happening to Jesus at that pivotal moment?

Luke 1: 31, 34-35 You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. “How will this be,” Mary asked th angel, “since I am a virgin?” The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the Holy one to be born will be called the Son of God.” Jesus is divinity and his mother Mary created in the image of God came together humanity and divinity (flesh and spirit), what a mix! We all understand a little biology and how DNA plays a very important part of our lives from both parents.

One thing when spirit and flesh connects like on the day of Pentecost Acts 2:1-4 there’s an elation, but when the spirit leaves th flesh there’s a ripping away so devastating the flesh(blood) groans and cries out. Genesis 4:10 And the Lord said unto Cain, “What have you done? Listen! Your brother’s blood cries out to me from the ground.”

The blood has power and is victorious in its flow. Like flowing water when poured out it’s all energy.

One thing I’ve realized as someone who trying to lead a spiritual life and I say trying because it is a battle; being spiritual in a carnal world. Matthew 26:41 Jesus says, ” the spirit indeed is will, but the flesh is weak.” What a lot of us spiritual people fail to realize is that we have aches and pains, even sicknesses that is hard to treat or explain that cannot be cured by carnal medication for it is an attack of the spirit. Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. We are so connected to everything, like that which is in the universe and on earth. Jesus demonstrated this with his cry out to God like a woman giving birth who in labour and with each contractions not realizing it is the separation and disconnecting(to release, birth) that causes the pain. In Matthew 27:50-51 And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook, the rocks split,(earthquake).

In conclusion, there are energy forces all around us and that in which we possess through God our father to whom it originated.

Twenty-three years ago I finally decided to go on a retreat to connect with the Almighty. My frustrations with religions( is there really a right and true one) my spirituality and all the unanswered questions about God. One day I had a vision of Love, there’s no other way to describe it. It was about love, forgiveness, patience, mercy, compassion, sacrifice, understanding, wisdom and knowledge. When you’d think about the goodness of God which is within each and everyone of us being created in His image, we can possess it if we choose. That is how she appeared to me, Queen of all Queens, Mary the mother of Jesus, to whom I believed had no importance other than she’s the mother of Jesus.

To make a long story short, after communicating with her I no longer feel that way. Mother Mary took her crown of heaven, crown of the earth and crown of the crucific, placed it on my head and handed the infant Jesus in my arms saying that I am her and she’s me, just as God has entrusted her with Jesus, she also enstrusts me with all God’s children. Whenever you believe you’re not worthy, God says yes you are. It is said we are saved by grace, Ephesians 2:8. But there’s a grace we possess within ourselves through the Holy ghost that enables us to walk, speak and do the impossible, that Mary had, not just favour.

Everyone wants to be a queen, not me. The only thing I could think of is the saying by William Shakespeare “Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown.” Luke 12:48 From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked. Luke 14:11 For everyone who exalts him or herself will be humble, and the one who humbles themselves will be exalted.Remember Moses in Exodus 4 trying to convince God he was not the man for the job to deliver God’s people out of bondage, I felt that same way.

When God calls you out, you are set apart from the ordinary. It is not you that is the alien or strange, it is the world and it systems of things contrary to the will of God or should I say the way things rightfully should’ve been before man sinned. When God puts a light in you, you can run, but you can’t hide, people always find you out. That light exposes you and then you wonder why so much oppositions from the enemy. For this light that should be for a blessing turns out to be a curse. It is one thing to be envied and jealoused by strangers, but like Joesph in Genesis 37 when he told his family about his dream. Sad, but it can creep into your own family and friends. For the crown of Mary, I have suffered like Joseph. And it is sad because people who don’t know my story assume with the title Empress that I am egotisitical, calling attention on myself. If only it was so. In carrying out my duties, many times I’ve stumbled in more ways than ever, but if it hadn’t been for the Lord who’s on my side. God kept me and is never letting me go, no matter what, as it is said, ” being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ.” Philipians 1:6 I don’t like lying so I would never call myself something I am not. The truth is I love my peace and quiet, don’t want to be noticeable.

Being Empress is not to impress man, but to be a servant of God.